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February 10, 2012
Lisa M. Krieger: Man with defibrillator demands access to his own heart's information
David G. Savage: Why activists may not be in a hurry to have High Court rule on alternative marriage
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Laura McMullen: 10 Least Expensive Public Schools for Out-of-State Students
Kimberly Palmer: How to actually enjoy -- relaxing, financially -- your vacation
February 8, 2012
Warren Richey: Why momentous Prop. 8 ruling might not satisfy gay-rights groups
Menachem Wecker: Though Controversial, LL.M.'s Can Lead to Specialized Legal Jobs
The Kosher Gourmet byDana Velden: Going to the bother of making soup? You know it better be good. This CREAM OF TOMATO SOUP certainly is! And it's a cinch to make, too (Includes techinques and serving secrets)
February 7, 2012
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Suzanne Bohan: Leaping lizards! Tiny reptiles advancing robot design
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Jonathan Tobin: Iran Threatens Israel With Destruction, But the New York Times Doesn't Hear It
Jeffrey Fleishman: In newly democratic Egypt, tens of democracy activists jailed, to stand trial; their groups are 'threatening the stability of the homeland'
Julie Deardorff : Researchers say antioxidants may not be that effective and could do more harm than good
Mark Clayton: How did Anonymous hackers eavesdrop on FBI and Scotland Yard?
February 3, 2012
Edmund Sanders : Israeli official says Iran is creating missile that could reach East Coast of US
Victoria Kim: Immigrant-smuggling ring used black drivers to avoid racial profiling
February 2, 2012
Jim Carney: Wrong number call may have saved her life
Reza Kahlili : Ex-CIA spy in Iran's Revolutionary Guard: What Obama doesn't grasp about striking deals with Tehran
Tina Susman: For woodchuck rescuer, every day is Groundhog Day
February 1, 2012
Brian Bennett: US officials see increasing threat of domestic attack from Iran
Emily Brandon: How to Take Advantage of New 401(k) Fee Disclosures
January 31, 2012
January 30, 2012
Paul Richter and Ramin Mostaghim: Misreading Teheran's limits -- deadly and economically devastating as they may be -- is a risk administration, Europe seem willing to take
Suzanne Bohan: Warning: Nap-deprived tots missing more than sleep, study finds
Meg Handley: Banks Revamping Rewards Programs to Woo Customers
January 27, 2012
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Yochonon Donn: In liberal New York City, fervently-Orthodox Jews may soon be getting a district to call their own
Jeannine Stein: An inflated ego and thinking you're 'all that' doesn't just make others sick of you, it can make you ill
Katy Hopkins: New budget rules may affect how much money you get for college
January 26, 2012
Ed Koch: To the New York Times, calling for the murder of Jews by those capable of having their incitement taken seriously isn't news
Jeannine Stein: Mental illness struck one in five U.S. adults in 2010: Report
January 25, 2012
Richard Simon: House passes two bills endorsing the use of religious symbols at military memorials
Fred Weir: Putin: Multiethnic Russia cannot survive as a US-style 'melting pot'; must find its own way
Susan Johnston: 5 Sneaky Coupon Strategies Consumers Should Watch Out For
January 24, 2012
Carol Clark: The price of your soul: How your brain decides whether to 'sell out'
Caroline B. Glick: America lost most in 'Arab Spring'. Sadly, many voters still don't grasp the extent
Warren Richey: Drug criminal scores win in GPS ruling from conservative-leaning high court
Erika Bolstad: Black conservatives gather to talk about gaining strength
January 23, 2012
Melissa Dribben: Jewish voters to play a key role in Florida's Republican primary
Jordan Rau: In quest to grow, Catholic hospital system will announce this morning its break from church
Ali Safi: U.S. envoy gives Taliban terms for peace talks
January 19, 2012
January 18, 2012
January 17, 2012
Frank J. Gaffney Jr.: No-kidding red lines: U.S. response to an Iranian nuke may be bluster, but Israel's won't be
David G. Savage: They sued their principals after slandering them online --- now the cases are headed to the Supreme Court
David Francis: Where to Invest in 2012: With stocks expected to rebound, opportunity abounds for investors
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Alexia Elejalde-Ruiz: Thriving through touch: Gentle massage helps older people with low mobility improve in mind and body
January 12, 2012
Warren Richey: Landmark Supreme Court ruling a 'resounding win' for religious groups
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John Fauber : Statins found to raise diabetes risk in postmenopausal women
Katy Hopkins : Consider This Before You Pay for an Online Degree
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January 11, 2012
Shari Roan: Millions of atrial fibrillation sufferers at risk for devastating, but preventable, stroke
Tom Hussain: Pakistan -- recipient of more than $21 billion in civilian and military aid -- speeds pursuit of Iranian pipeline, defying US
David G. Savage: High court signals it won't be loosening TV's 'indecency' rules
Stephen Ceasar: Oklahoma's Islamic law amendment can't go into effect, court rules
January 10, 2012
Reza Kahlili: From an ex-CIA spy: US must exploit new split in Iran's Revolutionary Guard
Karen Kaplan: Study: Nicotine replacement products ineffective when used in real-life situations
January 9, 2012
Michael Doyle: Put through legal hell over dream home, couple fought back hard --- all the way to Supreme Court
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Jewish World Review
July 2, 2009
/ 11 Tamuz 5769
It's enough to make your wig spin
By
Lori Borgman
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http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
Since we'll be commemorating the anniversary of the Declaration of Independence this
week, it seems a fitting time to update you Founders on a few things that have
happened since you began this nation.
No, Ben, we're not going to open the meeting in prayer. Yes, we know that at the
Constitutional Convention in Philadelphia you moved that sessions be opened with
prayer, but there wasn't enough money to hire a chaplain.
Yes, sir, we have the money. Yes, sir, it is rumored you can still find a few people
of faith in our nation's capital; it's just that praying in public is discouraged
these days.
We can however, pause for a moment of silence. Heads bowed, please. One
one-thousand, two one-thousand. All righty, thanks fellas.
What's that, George? You're wondering about the stature of the office of the
presidency? Yes, we are aware you had concerns that office not be treated like
royalty.
Well, and I think you're going to get a kick out of this, sir, the editor of
Newsweek said that our president, Barack Obama, stands above the country and the
world, "he's sort of G-d."
George? Could someone get George the smelling salts? Clear a path, please. Thank you.
Mr. Madison, Mr. Hamilton and Mr. Jay, you will appreciate knowing that the
Constitution is still with us. It is treated like soft clay, but the frame is still
there. A few changes of note:
We no longer fear the federal government or seek to limit it one iota.
Is Ben's wig spinning? Could someone calm that man down?
What's that, George? Government is like fire? It is a dangerous servant and a
fearful master?
We're embracing the "master" phase right now, sir. The federal government has taken
over banks, mortgage companies, insurance companies and automobile companies. The
feds are racking up trillions of dollars in debt it will take generations to pay and
selling our notes to the Chinese.
Mr. Hamilton, please quit moaning! Others can't hear.
Just a few more things. Security, could you move down front? The Randolph
contingency is getting restless. The federal government is about to provide health
care for every man, woman and child. Government bureaucrats will tell people what
procedures they can have done and which doctors they can see.
I knew you'd be excited! Calm down, gentlemen! Big government is our friend now.
No, there wasn't any bloodshed. No battle. We just handed omnipotence to the feds on
a silver platter.
America's enemies? There's no shortage, gentlemen. They've sworn to kill us. We had
a number of them locked up in a prison called Guantanamo, but we're setting them
free. We sent a few to a beautiful tropical island and the rest we may bring up here
to the States. We fight our battles with words these days - adverbs, adjectives,
prepositional phrases, alliteration.
No, Mr. Jefferson, I'm not joking.
What's that Mr. Jay? Doesn't anyone read the Constitution or the Federalist Papers?
It's such dry reading, sir. All those big words and no pictures. If you could get
someone to do a music video about them, you might gain some interest. We're just not
that into reading anymore we do Twitter though.
It's not a bird, Mr. Hancock. Twitter is a oh, never mind.
What's that, Ben? Have we never heard of liberty?
Of course we have. It's a bar over on Broadway.
Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.
JWR contributor Lori Borgman is the author of , most recently, "Catching Christmas" (Click HERE to purchase. Sales help fund JWR.) and I Was a Better Mother Before I Had Kids To comment, please click here. To visit her website click here.
ARCHIVES
© 2009, Lori Borgman
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