Jewish World Review July 22, 2008 / 19 Tamuz 5768
And now for the important news ....
By Argus Hamilton
The New York Post said Friday Lindsay Lohan might have a teen-aged half-sister in Long Island she never knew was alive. The rush is on to find her. These people get so many millions for their baby pictures, it's a better investment than oil futures.
Barack Obama landed in Afghanistan on Saturday where he met with the provincial governor of Jalalabad. It was nothing new to him. To Democrats, all governors who don't run New York or Massachusetts or California are considered provincial governors.
Barack Obama met last weekend with Arab leaders in Iraq, Kuwait and Jordan. It was an intelligence bonanza. That New Yorker cartoon showing Barack Obama dressed as a Muslim and his wife as a terrorist had these guys spilling state secrets to him.
Iraq's prime minister Nouri al-Maliki said Friday he favors Barack Obama's plan to pull all U.S. troops out of Iraq in sixteen months. Last year Barack Obama's plan was to pull all U.S. troops out in one month. At this rate, by the time Barack Obama becomes president he'll be naming the permanent U.S. bases in Iraq after Teddy Kennedy.
Chicago O'Hare Airport officials dispatched ambulances to assist the Mexicana Airlines jet that overshot the runway and crashed into a safety barrier Friday. No one was hurt. All one hundred and forty-two passengers parachuted out over California.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
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© 2007, Argus Hamilton