Jewish World Review July 16, 2008 / 13 Tamuz 5768
And now for the important news ....
By Argus Hamilton
Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt gave birth to twins last weekend in France, adding to their growing brood. It's one noisy house. The children they have adopted have already begun demanding international development aid from the children they have had.
Pasadena's Indymac Bank reopened Monday after a run on the bank Friday. It was wild. That morning some guy took his debit card to the Mobil station and filled up his Escalade with premium, and the next thing anybody knew, the bank was insolvent.
Miss Venezuela won the title of Miss Universe Sunday. Miss USA slipped onstage and fell legs up in a slit evening gown for the second straight year. Ever since Britney Spears started doing their choreography they get a lot more views on YouTube.
The New Yorker ran a cover cartoon Monday of Barack Obama dressed as a Muslim terrorist. His wife is dressed as a Black Panther. It just shows that a cartoonist can do with a pen what Jesse Jackson can only dream of doing with a pair of scissors.
Minnesota's former governor Jesse Ventura announced Monday he will not run for the U.S. Senate as an independent. It's really a shame. Jesse Ventura is the only man who can take Washington politics and raise it to the level of professional wrestling.
Congress broke into angry debate Monday over different ways to reduce gasoline prices. It's a problem they understand. Congressmen have to drive their own cars because cab drivers refuse to pick up people who are statistically likely to rob them.
Barack Obama spoke before the National Council of La Raza Sunday, and he spoke before the NAACP convention Monday. He will be addressing a white audience this weekend. He has purchased two thirty-second advertising spots during the British Open.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
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© 2007, Argus Hamilton