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Nov. 24, 2009
Rabbi Avi Shafran : The Atheists' unintended gift
JWisdom.com: You are a Philanthropist with Aliza Bulow (5 minutes)
Nov. 23, 2009
JWisdom.com: Actually, it really is all about you with Rabbi Lawrence Hajioff
Nov. 20, 2009
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Caroline B. Glick: Whither American Jewry
Nov. 19, 2009
Binyamin L. Jolkovsky: Please Listen to this Godcast (5 minutes)
Jonathan Tobin: ADL Crosses the Line with Report Bashing Obama Critics
Nov. 18, 2009
Rabbi Yonason Goldson: What Judaism has to say about the secret of the Mona Lisa's smile
JWisdom.com: The (Jewish) Dating Game with Rabbi Lawrence Hajioff (8 minutes)
Nov. 17, 2009
Steven Emerson: How Does the 4th Amendment Impact Terror Finance Investigations?
JWisdom.com: If Frank Sinatra married Edith Piaf with Rabbi Y.Y. Rubinstein (2 minutes) Life lessons from what would be regarded as the most inappropriate lyrics ever sung
Nov. 16, 2009
The Jewish Ethicist by Rabbi Dr. Asher Meir : When borrowing is stealing
JWisdom.com: Deconstructing faith with Rabbi Warren Goldstein (9 minutes)
Nov. 13, 2009
JWisdom.com Sarah's subjective reality with Rabbi Sroy Levitansky ( 6 minutes)
Caroline B. Glick: Obama's failure, Netanyahu's opportunity
Nov. 12, 2009
The Kosher Gourmet By Marialisa Calta : A sweet sweet potato treat
JWisdom.com Does God get tired? with Rabbi Harvey Belovski ( 5 minutes)
Nov. 11, 2009
Rabbi Avi Shafran: Jews and money: When anti-Semitism isn't
JWisdom.com Marriages are not made in Heaven with Rabbi Lawrence Hajioff (VERY fast 15 minutes)
Nov. 10, 2009
Michael Doyle: Author of book exposing CAIR ordered to remove supporting documents from Web
JWisdom.com If the creation so loudly shouts the existence of the Creator, why aren't more people believers? with Rabbi Naftali Brawer (9 minutes)
Nov. 9, 2009
Mark Steyn: Shooter exposes hole in U.S. terror strategy
JWisdom.com It's never too late to have a happy childhood with Sarah Chana Radcliffe (5 minutes)
Nov. 6, 2009
Rabbi Berel Wein: Choosing to hear
JWisdom.com Zero to 1/60th: How to Empower An Hour with Gavriel Aryeh Sande (7 minutes)
Caroline B. Glick The mullahs' big week
Suzanne Fields A Fallen Wall for Fallen Man
Nov. 5, 2009
The Kosher Gourmet: Three scrumptious -- but simple -- butternut squash dishes
JWisdom.com Hidden Hints: Unlocking Faith & Prayer with Rabbi Jay Yaacov Schwartz (10 minutes)
Nov. 4, 2009
Tom Hamburger and Kim Geiger: Should prayers be covered?
JWisdom.com When God played peacemaker With Rabbi Sroy Levitansky (5 minutes)
Nov. 3, 2009
Martin Peretz: Beware, Barack. Beware, Rahm. Beware, Axelrod
JWisdom.com Are you are closet idolater? With Sara Yoheved Rigler (10 minutes)
Nov. 2, 2009
Paul Greenberg: The Holocaust is now on Facebook
JWisdom.com Abraham's Strange Change With Rabbi Yitzchok Fingerer (5 minutes)
Oct. 29, 2003
Mortimer B. Zuckerman: Graffiti On History's Walls (MUST-READ!)

Jewish World Review July 9, 2007 / 23 Tamuz, 5767

Caring for parents a potential strain on family

By Jan L. Warner & Jan Collins


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http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Q: After my mother-in-law suffered a stroke nearly two years ago, my wife and I have cared for her mother at home with us. When we saw that we could not handle this part-time and could not get my wife's siblings to help, my wife stopped working to stay at home with her full-time. This meant her losing the ability to retire early.


Of late, my mother-in-law was diagnosed with dementia, and we just can't do it any longer. We tried to find a facility that would admit her, but because she only has $1,500 to her name and $720 per month in Social Security, the nursing homes tell us that there is an 18-month wait for a "Medicaid bed," and that they can't take her unless my wife and I guarantee to pay for her care at more than $5,500 monthly. We tried to discuss splitting the costs with her brother and sister, but they are not interested, and my wife and I simply can't afford to assume this cost. We are at our wit's end.


A: Yours is a prime example how long-term care may have an intergenerational impact on the family: Your wife stops work to care for her aged mother which, in turn, reduces your current family income and her chance for retirement which, in turn, obliterates your family's retirement planning, passing responsibility on to your children should you require this type of care.


Oftentimes, the most difficult questions faced by families who care for disabled persons are if and when that individual should be admitted to a nursing home or other type of care facility. In addition to the personal conflicts surrounding these questions, there are a variety of legal, medical and financial issues that must be considered.


If your mother-in-law had the funds with which to pay privately for her stay in a facility, there would be no obstacle to her entering a nursing home, regardless of the state of her health; however, for her stay to be paid for by Medicaid, rigid medical and financial requirements must be satisfied.


Based upon her assets as you describe them, she will meet the financial criteria; however, while she may be difficult for you to handle, your mother-in-law might not meet the requisite medical criteria. For this reason, before moving down the planning path too far, we suggest that you and your wife make sure that institutionalization is the appropriate option by having your mother-in-law's functional capacity assessed by a qualified geriatric care manager. Once a clear picture of her care needs has been made, you will be better able to determine the required level of care — which might not be in a nursing home. If this is the case, there may be other options for you to consider not covered here because of space limitations.


But assuming she does meet the required medical level of care, your next hurdle is gaining her admission to a Medicaid-certified facility. While the Nursing Home Reform Act of 1987 (NHRA) is credited with bringing about nursing home regulation reform, Congress did not go far enough when it comes to situations like yours. While strengthening individual rights and improving the quality of life and standard of care for nursing home residents, the nursing home admission process in most states is far from organized or fair. Since there are no centralized application procedures, in order to find a bed, you must visit a number of facilities, complete an application at each, and be placed on a waiting list for a bed.


Taking the NextStep: We will cover admission procedures and guarantee issues in an upcoming column.

Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.

JAN L. WARNER received his A.B. and J.D. degrees from the University of South Carolina and earned a Master of Legal Letters (L.L.M.) in Taxation from the Emory University School of Law in Atlanta, Georgia. He is a frequent lecturer at legal education and public information programs throughout the United States. His articles have been published in national and state legal publications. Jan Collins began co-authoring Flying SoloŽ in 1989. She has more than 27 years of experience as a journalist, writer, and editor. To comment or ask a question, please click here.

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© 2007, Jan Warner

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