Jewish World Review July 27, 2006 / 2 Menachem-Av, 5766
And now for the important news ....
By Argus Hamilton
Rudy Giuliani on Monday bawled out New York Yankees fans for their merciless booing of superstar Alex Rodriguez. He's being jeered everywhere he goes. John Bolton called from the United Nations and told him it's just part of being a Yankee.
Washington D.C. on Monday began installing new sidewalks made of out of rubber from ground-up tires. They are really thinking ahead. When the voters throw the congressmen out of office this November they can land on Lobbyist Row in two bounces.
Congressman Bob Wexler of Florida had to explain Monday why he told Comedy Central that cocaine is a fun thing to do. What's happened to this country? It is a sad day in America when a lawmaker can't promote his state's biggest moneymaker.
Israeli warplanes hit Beirut Tuesday as Hezbollah rockets struck Israel. The public is split. Polls show one-third of Americans want U.S. troops to keep the peace while two-thirds think Barry Bonds cheated to break Beirut's home run record.
The Lundberg Survey said the average gas price hit three dollars a gallon Sunday. This is prompting a lot of innovation in the energy business. John Basedow is working on a backyard fitness machine that allows you to pump iron and oil at the same time.
The U.S. government clamped down on prescription drug imports from Canada this week, provoking customer fury. It's perplexing. You would have thought that once Baby Boomers ran the federal government, the war on drugs would stop at arthritis medicine.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
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© 2006, Argus Hamilton