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May 22, 2013
John Thorne:
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May 20, 2013
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Jewz in the Newz by Nate Bloom : Jews Inducted into Rock Hall of Fame; Anton Yelchin co-stars in New "Trek" film; Kutcher (but not Kunis) visits Israel; Jewish TV Star Praises Jewish Rap Star
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May 10, 2013
Rabbi Berel Wein: Be all that you should be
May 8, 2013
Peter Ford: Why China is welcoming both Israel's Netanyahu and Palestinians' Abbas
Warren Richey: Obama administration quietly backs out of appeal over new contraceptive mandate
Fred Weir: At Kerry-Putin meeting, US-Russia relations thaw --- a tad
The Kosher Gourmet by Leela Cyd Ross : Almost too pretty to eat, this colorful salad with Sicilian inspiration will tickle the taste buds and delight your visual sensibility
May 6, 2013
May 3, 2013
Kids, kittens the Same? With employee perks at struggling Internet pioneer Yahoo! it's hard to tell
Sandy Kleffman: Artificial kidney offers hope to patients tethered to a dialysis machine
April 29, 2013
Roy Gutman: Poland's new Jewish museum celebrates life, doesn't revisit Holocaust
Mark Clayton: Terrorism in America: Is US missing a chance to learn from failed plots?
Kim Murphy: Boston Bomber's 'Svengali' Revealed
Pete Spotts: Tiny satellites + cellphones = cheaper 'eyes in the sky' for NASA
April 26, 2013
Clifford D. May: Defense in the Age of Jihadist Terrorism
Sharon Palmer, R.D.: How to feel your best -- with plenty of energy, a healthy weight and optimal mental and physical function -- without driving yourself batty
April 24, 2013
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Jewish World Review
June 19, 2006
/ 23 Sivan, 5766
And now for the important news ....
By
Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
Bill Gates announced Friday he's going to retire from the
company he founded in two years. He said he plans to spend his
fifty billion dollar fortune trying to cure AIDS. If he succeeds,
it will be the first virus that Microsoft ever stopped.
Tiger Woods missed the cut in the U.S. Open at Winged Foot
Golf Club on Friday for the first time in his career. He admitted
he hadn't picked up a club in a month. He should have gone down to
Double-A with Roger Clemens to work on his stroke.
Germany beat Poland in the World Cup with a goal in the
ninety-second minute Wednesday. The Polish team made the mistake
of trying to outshoot the Germans. They ignored Russia's advice to
retreat to their goal and wait for winter to set in.
Tom Cruise was rated the world's most powerful celebrity in
a list published by Forbes magazine on Friday. Any psychiatrist
could explain why. Everybody is always riveted when you get to the
next-to-the-last note in Pop Goes the Weasel.
Congresswoman Cynthia McKinney found out Friday she will not
be indicted for striking a Capitol cop. It was on constitutional
grounds. The grand jury agreed it would be cruel and unusual
punishment to sit through the trial of Cynthia McKinney.
Congress heard testimony Wednesday about fraudulent claims
for money by Hurricane Katrina victims. Over one billion dollars
of federal aid was diverted to booze and strip shows and gambling.
Look, we're either rebuilding New Orleans or we're not.
Senator John McCain demanded Thursday that ballplayers be
tested for Human Growth Hormone. The players are currently tested
for steroids, pot, cocaine and speed. They should have read that
exclusivity clause when the league signed with Budweiser.
Hillary Clinton gave a speech about privacy on Friday. She
said that privacy is at the crossroads of many issues and must be
reconciled with technology. She was so vague and noncommittal that
John Kerry accused her of stealing his act backstage afterwards.
The Energy Department predicted Friday that gasoline prices
will remain high all summer. It's not all bad news. Gasoline is so
expensive in Washington D.C. that Congressman Kennedy's credit
rating went up when he lost his driver's license.
The World Cup, it was reported Friday, has resulted in a
ten percent increase in Germany's legal brothels. Once again
America is at odds with Europe. They're legalizing prostitution
and we're kicking it off the House Ways and Means Committee.
The White House offered a twenty-five-million-dollar reward
for al-Qaeda's new leader in Iraq. The same reward was just paid
to the guy who turned in al-Zarqawi to the Americans. Osama was so
grateful to eat again after we froze all his accounts.
Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.
JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements.
Comment by clicking here.
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© 2006, Argus Hamilton
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