Jewish World Review June 23, 2005 / 16 Sivan, 5765
And now for the important news ....
By Argus Hamilton
Tom Cruise was squirted in the face with water from a joke
microphone at the premiere of War of the Worlds. When he didn't
melt, it told us something very important. We don't know if he's
gay, but we know he is not the Wicked Witch of the West.
Switzerland said Tuesday that Syrian assets in Swiss banks
fell thirty-nine percent in the last year. Damascus insists that
it didn't have anything to do with funding the insurgency. Once
again an Arab dictator has a son who's addicted to day-trading.
Howard Dean gave a speech in Boston Monday where he lashed
out at Republican Party principles and ridiculed Dick Cheney.
Howard Dean doesn't generally like Boston. The bars are always
asking him to leave so they can start Happy Hour.
Senator Bob Byrd said in his new book he was a top recruiter
for the Ku Klux Klan sixty years ago. He signed up two hundred men
and was praised by the Grand Dragon. He was so at home in the
Senate he didn't even stick out until just recently.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements.
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© 2005, Argus Hamilton