Jewish World Review June 12, 2005 / 5 Sivan, 5765
And now for the important news ....
By Argus Hamilton
Tom Cruise alarmed Hollywood by promoting Scientology at the
MTV Awards. The group is growing. Germany just declared
Scientology a political extremist group, and with an endorsement
like that membership in the Arab world quadrupled overnight.
The Michael Jackson jury ended its deliberations Friday and
went home for the weekend without reaching a verdict. There was
tension all over the pop star's face. However, it is a little late
in the game to tell Michael Jackson to lighten up.
Barry Bonds was accused Friday of declining an autograph
request saying that he doesn't sign things for white people.
Reaction was swift. Howard Dean called him and asked if he would
like to be his press spokesman until his knee gets better.
The Trade Bank of Iraq announced Thursday it will issue the
country's first-ever credit cards and debit cards. The first fifty
Visa cards will be given to government officials. So they are well
on their way to an American-style deficit.
The Booz Allen Classic wraps up today at the Congressional
Country Club. Lifetime memberships in the club are given to U.S.
presidents. Bill Clinton never knows if he's going to play the
front nine or the back nine until he hits his first tee shot.
Food and Drug Administration nominee Lester Crawford was
cleared Thursday of charges he had sex with an office subordinate.
Hillary Clinton has put a block on his confirmation vote. You knew
that eventually she would take it out on somebody.
The FBI missed five chances to break up the September 11th
plot, according to a report by the inspector general. This wasn't
the bureau's finest hour. Their first assessment of the attack was
that America West pilots must be drinking again.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
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© 2005, Argus Hamilton