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April 21, 2014

Andrew Silow-Carroll: Passoverkill? Suggestions to make next year's seders even more culturally sensitive

Sara Israelsen Hartley: Seeking the Divine: An ancient connection in a new context

Christine M. Flowers: Priest's execution in Syria should be call to action

Courtnie Erickson: How to help kids accept the poor decisions of others

Lizette Borreli: A Glass Of Milk A Day Keeps Knee Arthritis At Bay

Lizette Borreli: 5 Health Conditions Your Breath Knows Before You Do

The Kosher Gourmet by Betty Rosbottom Coconut Walnut Bars' golden brown morsels are a beautifully balanced delectable delight

April 18, 2014

Rabbi Yonason Goldson: Clarifying one of the greatest philosophical conundrums in theology

Caroline B. Glick: The disappearance of US will

Megan Wallgren: 10 things I've learned from my teenagers

Lizette Borreli: Green Tea Boosts Brain Power, May Help Treat Dementia

John Ericson: Trying hard to be 'positive' but never succeeding? Blame Your Brain

The Kosher Gourmet by Julie Rothman Almondy, flourless torta del re (Italian king's cake), has royal roots, is simple to make, . . . but devour it because it's simply delicious

April 14, 2014

Rabbi Dr Naftali Brawer: Passover frees us from the tyranny of time

Greg Crosby: Passing Over Religion

Eric Schulzke: First degree: How America really recovered from a murder epidemic

Georgia Lee: When love is not enough: Teaching your kids about the realities of adult relationships

Cameron Huddleston: Freebies for Your Lawn and Garden

Gordon Pape: How you can tell if your financial adviser is setting you up for potential ruin

Dana Dovey: Up to 500,000 people die each year from hepatitis C-related liver disease. New Treatment Has Over 90% Success Rate

Justin Caba: Eating Watermelon Can Help Control High Blood Pressure

The Kosher Gourmet by Joshua E. London and Lou Marmon Don't dare pass over these Pesach picks for Manischewitz!

April 11, 2014

Rabbi Hillel Goldberg: Silence is much more than golden

Caroline B. Glick: Forgetting freedom at Passover

Susan Swann: How to value a child for who he is, not just what he does

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Financial Tasks You Should Tackle Right Now

Sandra Block and Lisa Gerstner: How to Profit From Your Passion

Susan Scutti: A Simple Blood Test Might Soon Diagnose Cancer

Chris Weller: Have A Slow Metabolism? Let Science Speed It Up For You

The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington Whitefish Terrine: A French take on gefilte fish

April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review

Nobody's going to tell me to 'Ban Bossy'

By Gina Barreca




http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | (MCT) I've been bullied into writing about the "Ban Bossy" movement.

Students, former students, friends who have young daughters, and now a woman in Kentucky, someone I've never met who lives in one of the two states I've never even visited (the other is Alaska), all insist that I must have something to add to this discussion.

My unmet pal in the Bluegrass State chided me for sidestepping and do-si-do-ing around Sheryl Sandberg's initiative — uncannily coinciding with the launch of Sandberg's latest book — to ban the word "bossy" so that girls can be free of the stigma attached to being regarded as assertive and in control.

With support from Michelle Obama, Melinda Gates, Beyonce and the Girl Scouts — a group I adore especially since they awarded me their Storytelling badge and thereby turned a lifetime of fibbing into a legacy of nonfiction narrative — Ban Bossy has become a big deal.

Media attention focusing on how "bossy" is used as a bludgeon against energetic, ambitious and articulate girls has been going on for several months. Frankly, I thought I could duck it. No, I suppose that's not exactly evidence of a leadership perspective, but it was nevertheless my goal in this particular instance.

Why? Why can't I embrace Ban Bossy?

Here are my three reasons:

1. I don't like the idea of banning words. Not only doesn't it work, it backfires. (Do I need to provide examples? Just choose random letters — C, M and N — and you'll hear your own versions of banned words; if you don't, do not write to me to ask what they are.) It raises the specter of censorship not only in its most ineffective form but also in its most pernicious one; we can encourage people to avoid poisonous and insulting terms, but who has the authority to ban a word? What we can do, of course, is to make people who use certain words feel as if they are outcasts and perhaps demonically possessed. Let's try that.



2. I don't think "bossy," which after all includes the word boss, is really such a bad thing. I know, I know (I understand, I understand) that children are susceptible to the slings and arrows of confining and discomforting labels. If you're called stupid and ugly, you are likely to grow up thinking of yourself as stupid and ugly. This is especially true for children who are real outliers of one sort or another: kids with disabilities, emotional and social as well as physical; kids who are poor and from families that are more worried about getting a roof over their heads than the possible effects of the glass ceiling even though their daughters might help raise them up from desperation; kids lost to inner worlds unreachable by anyone except the most patient caregiver.

"Bossy" is not one of the world's sharpest arrows; it's more like a rubbery slingshot. But that's where a lesson in resilience is useful; girls need is to speak up, make trouble, act for themselves and evidence such mastery (not mistressery, but mastery) of rhetoric, debate and humor that an antagonist can use any damn word as ammunition without ever getting close nicking the shield of intelligence, strength and ingenuity the girls hold fast.

3. Maybe I could, if I embrace the concept if its catchphrase appeared aware of its own irony: "Ban Bossy" is a very bossy thing to say.

Thirty years of teaching young women, working with men and women, and writing the lives lived by girls and women has taught me this: Whenever a girl or woman opens her mouth and utters something other than a baby-voiced, cooing noise, someone will malign her. Hey, there are folks with nothing else to do. But such responses should be an inspiration to, and a lesson in, how to be more powerful, not an argument against it.

How about this instead? Let's be able to say of our daughters what Shakespeare says of one of his characters: "And though she be but little, she is fierce." That's the kind of movement I'll join: one where I can stamp my feet and make some noise.

Gina Barreca is a columnist for The Hartford Courant.

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Previously:


When a wave and a smile are magic
Gwyneth needs to recouple with reality
Let's all take the new SATs! --- or not!
Laugh often and 19 more rules to live by
Confessions of a promiscuous shopper
Can women ever be good enough?
Why are women left holding the bag?
Check Your Bumper Sticker At The Door
How a customer became a sucker and then got mad
Using reality TV to reveal your personality
Unlearning the kindergarten lessons of life
Things everyone must stop doing right now
Six truths about summer --- it's no picnic
Anthony Weiner --- we've seen enough of you
When women shop, expectations usually out of stock






© 2013, The Hartford Courant Distributed by MCT Information Services

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