Jewish World Review May 26, 2011 / 22 Iyar, 5771
And now for the important news ....
By Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | The Australia Tourist Bureau reported a record number of Californians visiting Australia this year Monday along with a huge number of Australians who visited California. We share a special kinship. Australia started out as a prison colony while California has evolved into one.
Maria Shriver discussed her TV career plans on Oprah's final show Wednesday taped last week in Chicago. She began in NBC News and could end up there. NBC Dateline just offered her the moon to host a new investigative show called To Catch a Predator with the Housekeeper.
President Obama enjoyed himself in Dublin Monday and he talked about one of his great-great-great grandfathers coming to America from Ireland. That makes him part-Irish and part Kenyan. The day he enters a drinking marathon he'll win it in two hours and three minutes.
President Obama paused dramatically while toasting the Queen at Tuesday's dinner. The orchestra thought he was finished and began playing G0d Save the Queen. President Obama ignored the orchestra and kept speaking, losing any chance of ever hosting the Academy Awards.
President Obama visited Westminster Abbey on Tuesday and signed his name to the guest book and added a salutation, but he signed 2008 by his signature. It was an honest mistake. The Teleprompter's copyright date was listed just below the words Best Wishes, Barack Obama.
The NBA fined Chicago Bulls star Joakim Noah fifty thousand dollars for yelling a gay slur Sunday. Yelling the same slur cost Kobe Bryant twice that amount two weeks ago. If players would just shout out oil prices when they get mad, gas would be down to two bucks a gallon now.
Oakland minister and Doomsday prophet Harold Camping told an interviewer Tuesday that he spent one hundred million dollars for newspaper ads announcing that the Rapture would occur Saturday. Who was going to stop him? As long as Wal-Mart refuses to advertise and department stores keep merging, newspapers aren't about to screen full-page ads for sanity.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements. Comment by clicking here.
© 2009, Argus Hamilton