In this issue
April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review May 13, 2011 / 9 Iyar, 5771

Lettuce: friend or fork?

By Lori Borgman

Lori Borgman

http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | As if life isn't tough enough, we are now burdened with the guilt of eating live lettuce. Live lettuce is a head of lettuce that comes in a plastic bowl with the root ball still attached. It's so live, that dirt still clings to the roots.

The theory is that live lettuce lasts longer, perhaps even for 10 days, providing you remember to refrigerate it, monitor it and water it regularly. Basically, live lettuce becomes like a pet — you it shelter, watch it, water it and grow attached to it. Then one day you day rip the leaves apart and throw it in a bowl with grated carrots.

It's one step away from catching a fish in your kid's aquarium and breading it for dinner.

Man was never meant to grow this attached to lettuce.

Some cooks numb live lobsters before dropping them in a pot of boiling by chilling them to ease the pain. Some even throw a splash of vodka in the boiling pot.

How do you numb living lettuce that has become your refrigerator friend before ripping it apart? Will a shot of Hidden Valley do the trick or does it prefer an olive oil and red wine vinegar?

Growers say the benefit of live lettuce is that it has been protected from the elements — rain, water, direct sun, all the things lettuce used to need to grow but are now considered potentially harmful. So now lettuce is grown in a greenhouse, never plants its tiny green feet in the earth, breathes outdoor air, or basks in the sun.

It's ironic really. We pay extra for chickens that have been allowed to roam free enjoy the sun and the outdoors, while we pay extra for lettuce that has been kept inside, under lock and key.

And now meet the pampered dairy cows featured in the Wall Street Journal. They are coddled by George Malkemus and Tony Yurgaitis, who built careers selling $500 Italian leather shoes for women. In an abrupt side-step, they have entered the dairy market — naturally, in good taste and high style.

They posted a sign that reads: "Every cow in this barn is a lady, please treat her as such." Do they ever.

Their cows are vacuumed daily so there's not a single fly on their bovine bodies. (What good is a tail without flies?)

The cows are even treated to shampoos. Dark-haired cows are slathered with something like Artec and blonde-haired cows are massaged in the gentle suds of Pantene. It is just a matter of time before cows start doing shampoo commercials.

The diva cows each have a specially blended feed and sleep on special order shavings. Other dairy farmers claim the milk from the cows at the spa isn't any better than milk from other cows — you know, the kind that don't shampoo, have body odor and sometimes slip in their own manure.

I'm just wondering if something might be out of kilter when the food we eat may be more pampered than we are.

And now I'm going out to the garden to cut a few sprigs of rosemary for tonight's chicken that did not roam free and never had the good fortune to visit Disneyland.

After that I'm going to make a salad. The lettuce isn't live; it won't feel a thing.

Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.

JWR contributor Lori Borgman is the author of , most recently, "Catching Christmas" (Click HERE to purchase. Sales help fund JWR.) and I Was a Better Mother Before I Had Kids To comment, please click here. To visit her website click here.


© 2009, Lori Borgman