JWR Schticks and groans

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In this issue
Nov. 20, 2009
Rabbi David Aaron: How to make every second of your life come first
Caroline B. Glick: Whither American Jewry
Nov. 19, 2009
Binyamin L. Jolkovsky: Please Listen to this Godcast (5 minutes)
Jonathan Tobin: ADL Crosses the Line with Report Bashing Obama Critics
Nov. 18, 2009
Rabbi Yonason Goldson: What Judaism has to say about the secret of the Mona Lisa's smile
JWisdom.com: The (Jewish) Dating Game with Rabbi Lawrence Hajioff (8 minutes)
Nov. 17, 2009
Steven Emerson: How Does the 4th Amendment Impact Terror Finance Investigations?
JWisdom.com: If Frank Sinatra married Edith Piaf with Rabbi Y.Y. Rubinstein (2 minutes) Life lessons from what would be regarded as the most inappropriate lyrics ever sung
Nov. 16, 2009
The Jewish Ethicist by Rabbi Dr. Asher Meir : When borrowing is stealing
JWisdom.com: Deconstructing faith with Rabbi Warren Goldstein (9 minutes)
Nov. 13, 2009
JWisdom.com Sarah's subjective reality with Rabbi Sroy Levitansky ( 6 minutes)
Caroline B. Glick: Obama's failure, Netanyahu's opportunity
Nov. 12, 2009
The Kosher Gourmet By Marialisa Calta : A sweet sweet potato treat
JWisdom.com Does God get tired? with Rabbi Harvey Belovski ( 5 minutes)
Nov. 11, 2009
Rabbi Avi Shafran: Jews and money: When anti-Semitism isn't
JWisdom.com Marriages are not made in Heaven with Rabbi Lawrence Hajioff (VERY fast 15 minutes)
Nov. 10, 2009
Michael Doyle: Author of book exposing CAIR ordered to remove supporting documents from Web
JWisdom.com If the creation so loudly shouts the existence of the Creator, why aren't more people believers? with Rabbi Naftali Brawer (9 minutes)
Nov. 9, 2009
Mark Steyn: Shooter exposes hole in U.S. terror strategy
JWisdom.com It's never too late to have a happy childhood with Sarah Chana Radcliffe (5 minutes)
Nov. 6, 2009
Rabbi Berel Wein: Choosing to hear
JWisdom.com Zero to 1/60th: How to Empower An Hour with Gavriel Aryeh Sande (7 minutes)
Caroline B. Glick The mullahs' big week
Suzanne Fields A Fallen Wall for Fallen Man
Nov. 5, 2009
The Kosher Gourmet: Three scrumptious -- but simple -- butternut squash dishes
JWisdom.com Hidden Hints: Unlocking Faith & Prayer with Rabbi Jay Yaacov Schwartz (10 minutes)
Nov. 4, 2009
Tom Hamburger and Kim Geiger: Should prayers be covered?
JWisdom.com When God played peacemaker With Rabbi Sroy Levitansky (5 minutes)
Nov. 3, 2009
Martin Peretz: Beware, Barack. Beware, Rahm. Beware, Axelrod
JWisdom.com Are you are closet idolater? With Sara Yoheved Rigler (10 minutes)
Nov. 2, 2009
Paul Greenberg: The Holocaust is now on Facebook
JWisdom.com Abraham's Strange Change With Rabbi Yitzchok Fingerer (5 minutes)
Oct. 29, 2003
Mortimer B. Zuckerman: Graffiti On History's Walls (MUST-READ!)

JewishWorldReview.com

The year of living vicariously

By Andrew Silow-Carroll


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Here's a Few Book Proposals I'm Considering


TO: Annie Daynow, literary agent
FROM: Andrew Silow-Carroll, professional writer
SUBJECT: My next book project


The last time I pitched you a book proposal, you turned me down — and frankly I don't blame you. My idea, a memoir about my family's heartwarming and life-affirming search for the perfect dog, was, as you so astutely pointed out, severely undermined by my chronic allergies, which prevented us from actually getting a dog. What was it you wrote in the rejection letter? Ah, yes: "No dog, no dog book."


You'll be happy to hear, then, that my latest proposal doesn't include a dog. You're familiar with "stunt journalism"? A.J. Jacobs wrote The Know-It-All about his experiences reading the Encyclopedia Britannica cover to cover. He followed that up with The Year of Living Biblically, for which he spent 12 months performing the Bible's commandments as literally as possible. Now we have My Jesus Year by Benyamin Cohen, an Orthodox Jew and rabbi's son who chronicled his year touring the Bible Belt.


The popularity of these books tells me the genre is not yet exhausted, even if their authors may be. Below are a few projects I'm considering.


"My Bar Mitzva Year" — Hilarity ensues when I tag along with my seventh-grade daughter on a year's worth of bar and bat mitzva invitations. Thrill to my late-night attempt to find yet another catering hall in an obscure Long Island exurb! Watch as I race my way through the 57th game of Coke and Pepsi! And see me shed a tear as the bar mitzva boy dedicates candle number six to his late Aunt Sophie - and sob some more when I realize there are still seven candles to go! (Added bonus for medical mystery buffs: My visit to the dermatologist, who will determine if the strange growth on my neck was caused by a Glo-Stick necklace.)


"Lotsa Matza: A Year Without Cametz" — It's tough enough to go without bread for the eight days of Passover — imagine 12 months eating shamelessly overpriced foods that contain not a whiff of leavened product, rice, corn, or anything else that brings pleasure to life. In "Lotsa Matza," I will ingest matza brei for breakfast, matza ball soup for lunch, and gallons of Pepto-Bismol at dinner. (Possible marketing tie-in: April is Irritable Bowel Syndrome Awareness Month.) On the serious side, I will investigate the kosher food business, and get to the bottom of such burning questions as, Is there any difference between eating a bowl of Manischewitz Fruity Magic breakfast cereal and injecting a half-cup of maple syrup directly into your veins?


"Paper Lion of Judah: Confessions from the Women's Philanthropy Department" — Think Yentl, Mandy Patinkin plays Mindy, and the setting is not a shtetl but the UJC's General Assembly, the year's largest Jewish charitable convention. I'll go undercover at the plenary sessions and buffet lines, and perhaps lead a discussion at a for-women-only breakout session. (Granted, not much drama here, but I'm thinking the screen adaptation could include a Some Like It Hot romance between my character and a small-town federation executive. Either way, I may need a budget for Max Mara suits and Michal Negrin jewelry.)


"The Boys and Girls on the Bus: Undercover with the Birthright Kids" — What really goes on during those 10-day, free trips to Israel for young people? And do you really want to know? I mean, isn't it enough that they're having a good time with other Jewish kids? So she fell in love with the sabra security guard — why complain? It's a phase. They all go through phases. What's that? He wants to come back with her to the States? Gevalt. Listen, tell her you're not going to help with the rent on her Upper West Side studio if he's going to use it to lounge around and pursue a cockamamie "music" career.




These are just a few of my ideas. Please let me know which one you'd be interested in pursuing and which has the best chance of being optioned for a movie starring Paul Rudd.

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JWR contributor Andrew Silow-Carroll is the editor in chief of the New Jersey Jewish News.

© 2009, Andrew Silow-Carroll