Jewish World Review May 1, 2007 / 13 Iyar, 5767
And now for the important news ....
By Argus Hamilton
Former CIA director George Tenet said Sunday the White House made him the fall guy for the decision to go to war. He told the president the evidence of Saddam's weapons was a slam dunk. It's no wonder the NBA All-Star weekend is always so violent.
Hillary Clinton's presidential campaign office stopped using her maiden name last week and now simply refers to her as Hillary Clinton. She's completely dropped the name Rodham. It's a sure sign that one of her brothers is about to get indicted again.
Boris Yeltsin received a stunningly beautiful state funeral in Moscow Wednesday in a Russian Orthodox service. He was a big favorite among the comedians. At the reading of his will he left behind five billion rubles, and that was just his bar tab.
Rudy Giuliani's first-quarter fundraising report showed he was the favorite candidate of the gambling, tobacco and alcohol industries. It makes perfect sense. Now that Rudy Giuliani is no longer prosecuting mobsters, he's got the Rat Pack's full support.
Alaska's former U.S. Senator Mike Gravel demanded during the Democratic debate Thursday that President Bush be jailed. A star was born. The web site that asks people to vote for the worst singer on American Idol has just thrown its support to Mike Gravel.
The Phil Spector murder trial was canceled for Tuesday due to a half-million Hispanic protesters marching downtown. It's all part of the ecological cycle. If Los Angeles doesn't burn to the ground every fifteen years there's no room for growth.
Hispanics will protest in Los Angeles today for illegal alien rights. They get a lot of support. Three suburbs declared themselves sanctuary cities so illegal aliens don't have to worry about being deported back to their home country of San Diego.
John Edwards said Sunday he favors higher taxes on businesses and the rich to pay for universal health care. It costs him nothing to say it. Democrats have the most fun on the campaign trail because they know they're not going anywhere after November.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
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© 2007, Argus Hamilton