Home
In this issue
Nov. 6, 2009
Rabbi Berel Wein: Choosing to hear
JWisdom.com Zero to 1/60th: How to Empower An Hour with Gavriel Aryeh Sande (7 minutes)
Caroline B. Glick The mullahs' big week
Suzanne Fields A Fallen Wall for Fallen Man
Nov. 5, 2009
The Kosher Gourmet: Three scrumptious -- but simple -- butternut squash dishes
JWisdom.com Hidden Hints: Unlocking Faith & Prayer with Rabbi Jay Yaacov Schwartz (10 minutes)
Nov. 4, 2009
Tom Hamburger and Kim Geiger: Should prayers be covered?
JWisdom.com When God played peacemaker With Rabbi Sroy Levitansky (5 minutes)
Nov. 3, 2009
Martin Peretz: Beware, Barack. Beware, Rahm. Beware, Axelrod
JWisdom.com Are you are closet idolater? With Sara Yoheved Rigler (10 minutes)
Nov. 2, 2009
Paul Greenberg: The Holocaust is now on Facebook
JWisdom.com Abraham's Strange Change With Rabbi Yitzchok Fingerer (5 minutes)
Oct. 30, 2009
Rabbi David Aaron: Secret to Immortality
Caroline B. Glick Silencing dissent in America
Oct. 29, 2009
Lini S. Kadaba: Do tactics avert flu or reduce humanity?
JWisdom.com We Must Revamp our Religious Vocabulary With Gavriel Aryeh Sanders ( 10 minutes)
Oct. 28, 2009
Rabbi Yonason Goldson: Atheists in Bubbleland
JWisdom.com Why what we wear impacts who we are With Rabbis Mordechai Becher, Menachem Golberger and Aliza Bulow ( 10 minutes)
Oct. 27, 2009
Paul Greenberg: The United Nations Is Outraged Again, Or: Department of Mideast Static
JWisdom.com The Science of Love With Rabbi Jonathan Rietti ( 7 minutes)
Oct. 26, 2009
The Jewish Ethicist by Rabbi Dr. Asher Meir: Damaging disclosures with a twist
JWisdom.com Wisdom and Wonks With Rabbi Eytan Feiner ( 7 minutes)
Oct. 23, 2009
Rabbi David Aaron: Are you ready for the ultimate pleasure?
JWisdom.com Watermark and oneness with Rabbi Sroy Levitansky ( 4 minutes)
Caroline B. Glick Stop using limited powers in a way that expands our enemies' advantages over us
Oct. 22, 2009
Steven Emerson: Terror Cases Share Desire to Kill Americans
JWisdom.com No More More Family Fights --- Really? By Sarah Chana Radcliffe ( 5 minutes)
Oct. 21, 2009
Tonya Alanez: Holocaust denier sues survivor, calling Auschwitz memoir 'vicious lies'
JWisdom.com Meditating Jewishly: A Panacea for Success by Sarah Yoheved Rigler ( 7 minutes)
Oct. 20, 2009
Dennis Prager: Obama and Dalai Lama: Why Israel Worries about U.S. President
JWisdom.com Abraham was not religious By Rabbi Yitzchok Fingerer ( 6 minutes)
Oct. 19, 2009
JWisdom.comWhy Good People Do Bad Things By Rabbi Eytan Feiner ( 7 minutes)
Oct. 16, 2009
Rabbi Yonason Goldson: The Perfect Number
JWisdom.com Hearing Voices By Rabbi Sroy Levitansky ( 5 minutes)
Caroline B. Glick How Turkey was lost
Oct. 15, 2009
Jeff Jacoby: Peace vs. the 'peace process'
JWisdom.com: Former MTV producer and stand-up comedian Rabbi Lawrence Hajioff: Taming a Control Freak (A VERY fast 15 minutes)
Oct. 29, 2003
Mortimer B. Zuckerman: Graffiti On History's Walls (MUST-READ!)

Jewish World Review May 25, 2006 / 27 Iyar, 5766

WORKING WHILE UGLY: Career Advice for the Unattractive

By Marty Nemko

Nemko
Printer Friendly Version
Email this article

http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | It's well known that attractive people earn more, but what should you do if you're, well, homely?


It's tempting to gripe about society's shallowness and refuse to capitulate to style over substance. But, unfortunately, in most careers, that will cost you.


Here are some strategies which, while unlikely to land you on the cover of People, should make you more successful and confident.

GENERAL FIXES
Work hard to present a winning personality


Even if you don't feel friendly and upbeat, act that way-often, the feeling will follow.


Poke fun at yourself. For example, a bald person might joke, "I never have a bad hair day." Someone with a big nose might say, "I have a great face for radio." If you're in a wheelchair, quip, "Wanna race?" If you appear comfortable with yourself, others will be more comfortable with you.


Catherine Kaputa, author of U R a Brand (www.selfbrand.com) adds, "Executive comportment is the big thing now. For example, when you enter a room, pause, enter slowly, with good posture, then greet people. Introduce yourself, play the host."


Follow the above advice and even if you look like the Elephant Man and are just moderately competent, you'll likely succeed in the workplace. People may even like you better than your hottie coworkers — everyone will be impressed that, despite your looks, you're appealing.

Donate to JWR


DRESS CAREFULLY
It's especially important that unattractive people wear nicely cut, quality clothes — no shiny polyester! If you're on a budget, instead of shopping at bargain-basement department stores, try high-end thrift shops where you can often find top-quality clothes at 70 to 90 percent savings.


How formal should you dress? Dress for the job you'd like to be promoted to.


Consider having a signature color. For example, celebrity attorney Gloria Allred usually wears, you guessed it, red. Sandy Dumont, a Washington, D.C. and Brussels-based image consultant (www.imagearchitect.com ) says that navy blue and blue reds (as opposed to orange reds) look good on almost everyone. Kaputa adds, "You're generally safest with monochromatic outfits."


Kaputa recommends having a visual trademark. Madeline Albright is known for wearing beautiful pins, Larry King always wears suspenders, Bono is rarely seen without his wraparound glasses. Want to make something your trademark?


Don't dress suggestively at work. You instantly lose credibility.


The perfect outfit becomes a liability if wrinkled or stained. You'd think people who spend a lot of money on clothes would know better, yet there are people in every workplace wearing a designer suit that's wrinkled, a silk blouse with stains, or an expensive shirt that's unbuttoned at the bottom, revealing belly hair. Ewwww.


Choose your hairstyle carefully. Hillary Clinton is legendary for the number of hairstyles she's gone through to create the image she wants to present. Look how different they make her look.


Don't smoke. If avoiding cancer isn't a good enough reason, consider the impression in conveys: Smoking appears ugly to most people, and, of course it makes your teeth yellow and your breath stink.

SPECIFIC PROBLEMS
You're overweight. Of course, it would be helpful if you lost weight, but that's often easier said than done. So for now, avoid tight clothing, and on the other extreme, the muumuu look. Busy patterns also make you look fatter. Instead, consider monochromatic outfits in dark colors.


You're balding. Here, I speak from personal experience. For a while, I tried combing my sparse hair forward or to the side. Forget it. Eventually, my friends told me that I wasn't fooling anyone. I then tried a hairpiece — for a few days. It looked good in the morning, but by day's end, unless I was willing to fuss with it every hour, its artifice started to show. Even one moment of detectability ruins months of perfect appearance. I rejected transplants because, except on a commercial, I've never seen one that looks good. I also rejected shaving my head — that is just another transparent attempt to hide thinning hair. Worse, it makes you look hard and unapproachable. Painful as it may be, it may be wisest to just wear your hair fairly short and comb it back.


You're getting (or feeling) old.


Get at least seven hours of sleep — fatigue adds years to your face.


Walk purposefully, even quickly — that conveys youth and energy.


Stand straight. Helen Gurley Brown said, only half joking, "After 40, it all comes down to posture."


Age shows most in our eyes and hair color. So wear flattering glasses and consider coloring your hair. Men, include your mustache or beard.


Your face is unattractive.


Draw attention elsewhere. A great hairstyle, or accessories such as jewelry, scarves, handbags, and shoes can refocus people's gaze.


Get a good makeup consultation. Forgo the teeny-bopper in the department store and spring for a few bucks for a pro. Get a recommendation from friends whose makeup looks good to you.


If you're considering cosmetic surgery, here's one way to find a good doc: Call a cosmetic surgeon's office, then ask the receptionist to recommend a few plastic surgeons other than her boss. The names that come up multiple times are good bets.


Consider working alone or with the same people each day.


If you've tried the above, you might be more successful in a job in where you work alone or with the same group of people each day. That provides time for your personality and competence to override the negative first impression.


STAYING MOTIVATED
It takes effort to convert yourself from creepy to captivating. To get motivated, think how you'd benefit from projecting a better image at work: You'll get more praise, enjoy better job security, maybe earn more money. It might be hard to stick with your plan, but it may yield bigger payoffs than being good at your job. Alas.

Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.

400+ of Dr. Nemko's published writings are on www.martynemko.com. Comment by clicking here.

Archives

© 2006, Dr. Marty Nemko

Insight (Our Columnists)

 Arnold Ahlert
 Mitch Albom
 Michael Barone
  Dave Barry
 Tony Blankley
 Andy Borowitz
 David Broder
 Stratfor Briefing
 Mona Charen
 Linda Chavez
 Ann Coulter
 Greg Crosby
 Larry Elder
 Suzanne Fields
 John Fund
 Frank J. Gaffney
 Lloyd Garver
 Jonah Goldberg
 Julia Gorin
 Jonathan Gurwitz
 Paul Greenberg
 Lewis Grossberger
 Victor Davis Hanson
 Betsy Hart
 Nat Hentoff
 David Horowitz
 Laura Ingraham
 Cheri Jacobus
Jeff Jacoby
 Paul Johnson
 Jack Kelly
 Ed Koch
 Ch. Krauthammer
 Michael Ledeen
 John Leo
 David Limbaugh
 Kathryn Lopez
 Rich Lowry
 Michelle Malkin
 Jackie Mason
 Dick Morris
 Bill O'Reilly
 Jim Mullen
 Clarence Page
 Kathleen Parker
 Dennis Prager
 Wesley Pruden
 Tom Purcell
 Jonathan Rauch
 Celia Rivenbark
 Robert Robb
 Cokie & Steve Roberts
 Pat Sajak
 Debra J. Saunders
 Culture Shlock
 Roger Simon
 Michael Smerconish
 Thomas Sowell
 Mark Steyn
 John Stossel
 Cal Thomas
 Bob Tyrrell
 Diana West
 Dave Weinbaum
 George Will
 Walter Williams
 Byron York
 Mort Zuckerman

'Toons
 Robert Arial
 Chuck Asay
 Baloo
 Chip Bok
 Dry Bones
  Lisa Benson
 John Branch
 Gary Brookins
 John Cole
 J. D. Crowe
 John Deering
 Brian Duffy
 Everything's Relative
 Mallard Fillmore
 Jake Fuller
 Bob Gorrel
 Joe Heller
 David Hitch
 Jerry Holber
 Steve Kelley
 Jeff Koterba
 Dick Locher
 Chan Lowe
 Ranan R. Lurie
 Jimmy Margulies
 Rick McKee
 Michael Ramirez
 Kevin Siers
 Jeff Stahler
 Ed Stein
 Danna Summers
 John Trever
 Gary Varvel
 Kirk Walters

Lifestyles
 How 2
 Lori Borgman
 The Savvy Consumer
 Elder matters
 Fixit
 Dr. Peter Gott
 GET A JOB! by Marty Nemko
 Richard Lederer
 Tech Maven
 Every Monday Matters
 Nutrition Myths
 Bookmark These
 Bruce Williams
 How Stuff Works