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Nov, 21, 2008

Rabbi A. Henach Leibowitz: Money matters?

Caroline B. Glick: Civilization walks the plank

Nov, 20, 2008

Rabbi Avi Shafran: Bronfman's blindness

The Kosher Gourmet By Linda Gassenheimer: Portobellos add a hearty flavor to pasta with pesto

Nov, 19, 2008

The Jewish Ethicist by Rabbi Dr. Asher Meir : Spread the wealth? Jewish tradition and income equality

Elliot B. Gertel: 'Mad Men': Tackling prejudices or reinforcing them?

Nov, 18, 2008

Dr. Debby Schwarz Hirschhorn: The End of the Age of Reason

Jonathan Tobin: Does Barack + Bibi = Disaster?

Nov, 17, 2008

Rabbi Yonason Goldson: The End of the Age of Reason

Diana West: Gulling Americans into making terror legit?

Nov, 14, 2008

Rabbi A. Henach Leibowitz: The Power of Spiritual Inertia

Caroline B. Glick: The perils ahead

Nov, 13, 2008

Stratfor Intelligence Briefing: How Bush and Obama together could change the Middle East dynamic

The Kosher Gourmet by JeanMarie Brownson: Sweet and savory, crispy and meltingly tender bestilla

Nov, 12, 2008

The Jewish Ethicist by Rabbi Dr. Asher Meir : Tyrannical Co-Workers

Michael Doyle: High Court to consider today donated monuments that may have religious messages in public parks

Nov, 11, 2008

Frank J. Gaffney, Jr.: Will Obama stop government officials considering institutionalizing financial jihad?

Jonathan Tobin: They Will Decide Their Own Fate

Nov, 10, 2008

Rabbi Avi Shafran: $8 billion, modern-day Tower of Babel being built?

Barry Rubin: A letter to the president-elect from a Middle East realist

Nov, 7, 2008

Rabbi Francis Nataf: Of Children and Immortality

Caroline B. Glick: Livni's Obama strategy

Nov, 6, 2008

Rabbi Yonason Goldson: How I tricked a classroom of apathetic students into grasping the fallacy of moral relativism

The Kosher Gourmet By Gina Kim: Tips for making the perfect soup --- includes recipes

Nov, 5, 2008

The Jewish Ethicist By Rabbi Dr. Asher Meir: Destitute Debtors

Bruce Weinstein: 'Religulos': Bad title,even worse movie

Nov, 4, 2008

Frank J. Gaffney, Jr.: Treasury Dept. submits to Shariah law

Frida Ghitis: A surprise for Obama in the Middle East

Nov, 3, 2008

Jonathan Rosenblum: Who says Jews are Smart?

Jonathan Tobin: Was He Wrong About Everything?

Oct. 31, 2008

Rabbi A. Henach Leibowitz: Our Immutable Noble Essence

Caroline B. Glick: Running against Bush

Oct. 30, 2008

Jonathan Rosenblum: The End of the Special Relationship?

Steve Lipman: 'Kid Kosher' Gets A Title Shot

Oct. 29, 2008

Binyamin L. Jolkovsky: GET US THE TAPE THE L.A. TIMES REFUSES TO RELEASE, AND WE'LL GIVE YOU CASH!

Dr. Ari Korenblit: Making The Write Choice for President

Oct. 28, 2008

Mona Charen: Denial runs through American Jewry

Frank J. Gaffney, Jr.: Sell-off to capitalism or sell-out to Islam?

Oct. 27, 2008

The Jewish Ethicist by Rabbi Dr. Asher Meir: Are tax deductions for charitable donations moral?

Jonathan Mark: The Mystery Of The Arab-American Vote

Oct. 24, 2008

'Why aren't all religious people vegetarians?': Response by Miriam Kosman

Caroline B. Glick: Testing Obama's mettle

Oct. 23, 2008

Daniel Pipes: Obama Would Fail Security Clearance

The Kosher Gourmet by Linda Gassenheimer: A fast chicken dish with an Asian accent

Oct. 20, 2008

Gary Rosenblatt: Still One Torah

Jonathan Tobin: Government 'Gifts' Are Not Free

Oct. 17, 2008

Jonathan Rosenblum: Sukkos and the Great Meltdown

Caroline B. Glick: The disappearance of law

Oct. 16, 2008

The Jewish Ethicist by Rabbi Dr. Asher Meir: Copying DVDs: RIP OR RIPOFF?

Cal Thomas: Blaming the Jews (again)

March 22, 2007

J-Rhythms with Avraham Rosenblum: JWR's cutting-edge music program showcasing performers -- singers, song writers, musicians, and bands -- who learn and live the Torah lifestyle (OUR NEWEST IGODCAST !)

Oct. 29, 2003
Mortimer B. Zuckerman: Graffiti On History's Walls (MUST-READ!)

Jewish World Review May 13, 2005 / 4 Iyar, 5765

Playing Catch-Up

By Gene Weingarten


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http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Most sexist stereotypes are false. Women are not worse drivers than men. Women can be just as decisive as men, just as competent, and, with proper inducement, they can even let rip a perfectly respectable belch. But I think we all know, in our hearts that at least one sexist stereotype is true. With notable exceptions, but by and large, in the aggregate, generally speaking, on the whole, in the main, qualifying this as much as possible to avoid disagreeable personal sanctions, women tend to Throw Like a Girl.

Because Washington now has its own pro team, the town is ababble in baseball. In offices all over the area, middle-aged men with the muscle tone of marshmallow Peeps have been loudly proclaiming about how they could have made the majors with just a little more practice. It was during one such conversation in my office that a female editor, just being sociable, said she'd always felt intimidated by baseball because she Throws Like a Girl.

Guys instantly snapped to attention. A baseball was produced, and, gamely, the editor— her nickname is, I swear, "Spike"— demonstrated her throw. Because Spike is a well-liked and well-respected member of our cubicle pod, no one laughed. But I will reveal here that she resembled an 18th-century Parisian fop with a perfumed hankie in his sleeve executing the arm motion accompanying the expression "Oh, pshaw."

Like any great architect of social change, I decided right then to seize the moment and right a grievous social wrong. For Mother's Day, I would present a foolproof method to cure America's women of Throwing Like a Girl.

As a student of Skinner, I knew that most behavior can be modified. And, as a student of Berra, I knew that 90 percent of baseball is half mental. All it would take is psychology.

Spike agreed to be Patient Zero. The next day we repaired to an abandoned part of The Washington Post building with all the necessary paraphernalia: two gloves, two Washington Nationals hats (one blue, one pink), a regulation baseball, a tape measure and some cooked pasta. In full "Oh, pshaw" mode, at top speed, Spike achieved a throw of 21 feet, roughly the distance from first base to, um, real close to first base. Then we stood face to face.

I told Spike that we were not going to be learning anything athletic, that we were simply going to be learning a new dance step. And that's what we did. Facing each other, holding hands, with my leading and her following perfectly, we rocked back, and then pitched with full leg drive and follow-through.

That was it. She had it. One shot. (I acknowledge that if a woman had tried to teach me this, as a dance move, in, say, 1987, I would still be trying to learn it.)

Next, with a strand of al dente spaghetti, I demonstrated the arm-whip action—the last piece of the Throw Like a Boy puzzle. On Spike's fourth attempt with a baseball, she hit 40 feet. This was no sissy lob; there was an eight-foot ceiling. She was bringing it.

But there was still a problem. Spike's first attempt to catch the ball in a glove resembled an attempt by a very nervous and jumpy one-armed person to catch a thrashing fish with a spatula.

Me: What is your daughter's name, and how old is she?

Spike: Christine. Seven.

Me: Christine is in the window of a burning building. She is terrified. You yell up to her, "Don't worry, Baby, Mommy will catch you." Because you must transcend your fear, a preternatural calm takes over, the sort of calm that has allowed 100-pound women to lift two-ton vehicles off their pinned children. At this moment you are no longer a mommy. You are not even a woman. You are a gigantic lump of mashed potatoes. You cannot drop her. Christine will be safe, enveloped by the yielding warmth of mashed potatoes.

Spike: Um, okay . . .

Me: Now look at your glove. That is not a glove. It is a scoop of mashed potatoes. The ball will sink into it, thwunk.

I threw the ball. Thwunk.

She returned it like Clemens.

Again. Thwunk. Again. Thwunk. When I declared her cured— 15 minutes after we began—Spike demanded to play some more. An hour later, I swear, she was Googling the price of baseball gloves.

Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.


Gene Weingarten writes the Below the Beltway humor column for The Washington Post. To comment, please click here.


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