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April 21, 2014

Andrew Silow-Carroll: Passoverkill? Suggestions to make next year's seders even more culturally sensitive

Sara Israelsen Hartley: Seeking the Divine: An ancient connection in a new context

Christine M. Flowers: Priest's execution in Syria should be call to action

Courtnie Erickson: How to help kids accept the poor decisions of others

Lizette Borreli: A Glass Of Milk A Day Keeps Knee Arthritis At Bay

Lizette Borreli: 5 Health Conditions Your Breath Knows Before You Do

The Kosher Gourmet by Betty Rosbottom Coconut Walnut Bars' golden brown morsels are a beautifully balanced delectable delight

April 18, 2014

Rabbi Yonason Goldson: Clarifying one of the greatest philosophical conundrums in theology

Caroline B. Glick: The disappearance of US will

Megan Wallgren: 10 things I've learned from my teenagers

Lizette Borreli: Green Tea Boosts Brain Power, May Help Treat Dementia

John Ericson: Trying hard to be 'positive' but never succeeding? Blame Your Brain

The Kosher Gourmet by Julie Rothman Almondy, flourless torta del re (Italian king's cake), has royal roots, is simple to make, . . . but devour it because it's simply delicious

April 14, 2014

Rabbi Dr Naftali Brawer: Passover frees us from the tyranny of time

Greg Crosby: Passing Over Religion

Eric Schulzke: First degree: How America really recovered from a murder epidemic

Georgia Lee: When love is not enough: Teaching your kids about the realities of adult relationships

Cameron Huddleston: Freebies for Your Lawn and Garden

Gordon Pape: How you can tell if your financial adviser is setting you up for potential ruin

Dana Dovey: Up to 500,000 people die each year from hepatitis C-related liver disease. New Treatment Has Over 90% Success Rate

Justin Caba: Eating Watermelon Can Help Control High Blood Pressure

The Kosher Gourmet by Joshua E. London and Lou Marmon Don't dare pass over these Pesach picks for Manischewitz!

April 11, 2014

Rabbi Hillel Goldberg: Silence is much more than golden

Caroline B. Glick: Forgetting freedom at Passover

Susan Swann: How to value a child for who he is, not just what he does

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Financial Tasks You Should Tackle Right Now

Sandra Block and Lisa Gerstner: How to Profit From Your Passion

Susan Scutti: A Simple Blood Test Might Soon Diagnose Cancer

Chris Weller: Have A Slow Metabolism? Let Science Speed It Up For You

The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington Whitefish Terrine: A French take on gefilte fish

April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review

When love is not enough: Teaching your kids about the realities of adult relationships

By Georgia Lee


Credit: ShutterStock



Love is the foundation on which lasting relationships are built. But love is just the beginning. Help your growing children learn the true work it takes to win at adult relationships


JewishWorldReview.com | Preparing your kids for adult relationships can feel like an impossible task. No matter how much you attempt to drill into her head, "Relationships aren't easy," "They take work," and "Nothing is perfect," she'll still look back on those fairy tales, bedtime stories and Disney® cartoons and swoon over the prince and princess living happily ever after. The end.


So how do you get through to your teen that "the end" is just the beginning, and the real work begins when the movie ends? How can you teach your children that love, by itself, isn't enough to sustain a healthy relationship?

LOVE IS JUST THE BEGINNING.

Love is the most important part of a healthy, beautiful adult relationship. But it is not everything. If relationships are houses, love is the foundation. With a strong foundation, anything is possible. With a weak foundation, no matter how strong the bricks, wood beams and roof, the house will collapse. And the relationship will crumble under its own weight.

BUILDING ON A SOLID FOUNDATION.

Once you have a solid foundation of love you have to build upward. But all buildings begin with a plan. And so should your relationship, at least in part. Have an idea of what materials you are looking to build with, what style of construction you desire and what interior design to go with before you begin. That is, make sure you and your partner are on the same page and are working toward the same goal. More than just liking the same things, make sure you are compatible on a deep level. Talk about your personal values, stance of social issues, desire for marriage and children, relationship with your family and day-to-day outlook and involvement with life.

STEP-BY-STEP.

If you skip steps at the beginning of a relationship, such as moving in too quickly, you will inevitably stumble and fall on your way to the top. Then you and your partner will have to pick yourselves up, bumps and bruises and all, and start from the bottom to work your way back up to relationship bliss. Only this time, slow and steady wins the race. Take your time to put each brick in place: trust, honesty, integrity, action, communication, values, etc. Each of these fitted tightly and layered on thick will create an impenetrable fortress for you and your family when the weather gets rough.

THE UGLY TRUTH.

People make mistakes. People also intentionally hurt each other. They will say and do mean things to each other in an attempt to gain control of the situation, or their partner. Teach your teen to beware of these behaviors in their partners and in themselves. Teach your teen to be aware of harming others even when it is not his intention. Also teach her the value of forgiveness. Hurt people hurt people, and only she can stop the cycle once she realizes the power she has to make a difference and change her relationship.

WHEN TO WALK AWAY.


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Sometimes all the work and commitment in the world can't conquer what two people have built. The relationship itself is the problem and needs to be demolished to build something better. Whether this happens together or apart depends on the couple and why the relationship needed to sever in the first place. In the case of "irreconcilable differences" you can likely deconstruct what you have and reconstruct a new relationship, with yourself, each other and your higher power while staying together. But if you are facing abuse, addiction, or other circumstances, healing and growth needs to occur beyond the bounds of the relationship and the other person. The love itself may even need to be extinguished to recover fully from what was.


Relationships are lifelong commitments that begin with your commitment to yourself and your higher power. When this relationship is strong and healthy, building a strong relationship with a partner will run much smoother. Your impulsive, hormonal and eager-to-be independent teens have a long way to go in realizing this reality. Give them time, and tell them this story as much as you told them all the other tales.

Georgia D. Lee is a graduate of the University of Miami School of Business and founder of a multimedia self-help, self-actualization, spiritual education and personal empowerment system.

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