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Feb. 8, 2013
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Jewish World Review
April 18, 2012/ 26 Nissan, 5772
Government service can be fun. Really.
By
Dale McFeatters
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
Job recruiters for the federal government complain that often they can't land the best, brightest and most promising youngsters because government service is seen as boring -- shuffling papers in drab offices in drab buildings.
The General Services Administration, for example, provides those drab offices and the gray metal desks and gray metal filing cabinets to go in them, not exactly pulse-quickening activity.
The Secret Service gets to stand around in drab suits, ear pieces and cool shades and talk into their wrists once in awhile, but when you come right down to it, what they basically do is stand around.
That's why the recent GSA scandal in Las Vegas and the Secret Service scandal in Colombia should be seen as opportunities, not occasions for censure. They show that government service can be fun -- perhaps in these cases too much fun, but fun nonetheless.
Eleven Secret Service agents and some members of the military are in hot water for what The Washington Post called "a night of ... widespread debauchery that included heavy drinking and a trip to the Pleyclub, a strip club." The New York Post reports that the night also included quantities of one of Colombia's best-known exports, cocaine.
The happy crew allegedly returned to their hotel with 21 hookers in tow. Rep. Peter King, R-N.Y., chairman of the House Committee on Homeland Security, said some of the men said they didn't know that the women were prostitutes. Mr. Chairman, it's bad enough that these guys are in serious trouble with their employer without you making them out to be complete hayseeds.
Events reportedly began running off the rails when, as one official told The Wall Street Journal, "One guy didn't pay the girl and kicked her out of the room." On second thought, maybe one hayseed in the bunch. "She started making a ruckus, screaming and kicking in doors." And that reportedly brought the police and a quick conclusion to what, up until then, had been a night of good degenerate fun and a great recruiting tool at any of the nation's better party schools.
By contrast -- as far as we know -- the GSA gathering in Las Vegas was a more sedate affair, even though it cost $823,000 and featured a clown, a mind reader, a "team-building exercise" to assemble a bicycle -- those are some cutups over at the GSA -- plenty of food and drink and a rap video making fun of the expense of the whole affair.
The Secret Service may be straight-up party animals, but the GSA's cubicle dwellers show more sophistication in partying at taxpayer expense. One ruse, apparently, is to invent an award and then fly off to a resort to hold an awards ceremony.
A variation on this, one GSA employee told the Associated Press, is when "several GSA officials flew to Hawaii for five to seven days in 2011 to attend an hourlong ribbon-cutting on space leased by the federal government."
We won't keep you government recruiters tied up any longer. Job seekers are probably lined up in your hallway even as we speak. Be sure to remind them of two basic rules: Don't appear in any videos while on a government junket, and always pay the hookers.
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Previously:
• 04/17/12 Scandal, yes, but Cartagena had summit, too
• 04/16/12 When your car is smarter than you are
• 04/13/12 Lenders tiptoe back into world of credit risks
• 04/12/12 What do you mean you don't want a driver's license?
• 04/11/12 Smartphone anti-theft plan seems, um, smart
• 04/10/12 Bizarre process to choose a veep
• 04/09/12 From remote exurbs, cities don't look so bad anymore
• 04/06/12 We do want the fake Romney, not the 'real' one
• 04/05/12 Heaping even more indignities on air travelers
• 03/29/12 Blown away in Washington, D.C.
• 03/28/12 At the nuke summit an inadvertent moment of candor
• 03/27/12 A worse unemployment problem
• 03/23/12 The federal budget: A game of make-believe
• 03/21/12 In Iraq, blame the U.S., but drive American
• 03/20/12 Too late, bin Laden realized killing Muslims was a mistake
• 03/16/12 Hu and Wen leaving. China asks: What next?
• 03/14/12 Tide, favored by housewives and drug dealers alike
• 03/09/12 'Spring forward' obsessives and seasonal purists
• 03/08/12 Really, no place is safe when you think about it
• 03/06/12 Putin 'carousel voting' victory
• 02/28/12 Fighter of future still glued to tarmac
• 02/27/12 Every candidate has to have a tax-reform plan
• 02/23/12 Au revoir, mademoiselle: It's been bonne
• 02/21/12 A new way of attacking food-stamp fraud
• 02/20/12 Feds don't want you driven to distraction
• 02/15/12 Putin has found can't lose campaign issue: Promoting a randier Russia
• 02/14/12 Obama's budget lays down battle lines for the fall
• 02/10/12 Filming in D.C. creates hassle for Hollywood
• 02/08/12 At Lake Vostok, Russia taps into new realm
• 02/07/12 'Granny dumping' in prisons
• 01/30/12 National Defense Authorization Act indefensible
• 01/23/12 Barbie sparks fear among Iran's mullahs
• 01/19/12 From overseas, U.S. industry is looking good
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• 01/13/12 Not exactly a biblical plague, but certainly an annoyance
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• 01/05/12 Majoring in unemployment
• 01/04/12 Cutting the military by blunt force
• 01/02/12 Pragmatic look at top words
• 12/22/11 Basketball the way to Kim's heart and nuclear weapons
• 12/21/12 Speculation and wishful thinking can get scary
• 12/20/11 A third Kim has North Korea by the throat
• 12/19/11 Congress pats itself on back for budget bill
• 12/15/11 The U.S. government is cashing in its chips, literally
• 12/14/11 TSA might try trusting its own people
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• 12/09/11 State Department Creates Virtual Embassy For Iran
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• 10/31/11 NATO should not be a victim of its success
• 10/28/11 Iran mulls getting rid of president and presidency
• 10/27/11 Bienvenidos a Dayton and bring your businesses with you
• 10/26/11 Archivists long for Obama's teleprompter
• 10/25/11 United Nations to run the Internet?
• 10/24/11 Attention, world: You've got the cash. We've got the houses
• 10/19/11 Oil pipeline must be in America's future
• 10/18/11 U.S. plans limited mission in an Africa with no limits
• 10/17/11 Social Security's grave mistakes
• 10/12/11 NASA's help-wanted sign for astronauts
• 10/10/11 Saving Thomas Jefferson''s chimneys
• 10/06/11 Uncle Sam's answer to deadbeats --- robo-calls
• 10/04/11 Christie should ignore jibes on his weight
• 10/03/11 Iran says its warships will head for Jersey shore
• 09/29/11 Europeans bristle at Obama's lectures
• 09/28/11 Jessica Rabbit for the defense
• 09/27/11 Russia learns outcome of next March's presidential election
• 09/26/11 Another try at leaving no child behind
• 09/23/11 This generation needs a job more than a name
• 09/22/11 In the lane next to you: A driverless car
• 09/20/11 Cloudy, cool, chance of falling satellite
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• 09/13/11 Paging Dr. Watson; he's there in 3 seconds
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• 09/08/11 A jobs program at Obama's doorstep
• 09/07/11 Iran's government afraid of the water
• 09/06/11 Congress returns, tanned, rested and testy
• 09/05/11 Space nations must clean up after themselves
• 09/02/11 Osama bin Laden died a failure and he knew it
• 09/01/11 Time to retire political pie in the face
• 08/31/11 Labor Day celebrates what, exactly?
• 08/30/11 These arrestees really are framed
• 08/25/11 When in an earthquake, block traffic
• 08/23/11 A case for discretion in deportation arrests
• 08/22/11 Tough times or not, parents shell out for school
• 08/18/11 Being unpleasant for fun, profit, promotion
• 08/17/11 Time to prepare for the end game in Libya
• 08/16/11: Super Committee starts facing reality
• 08/15/11: World's fastest plane disappears even faster
• 08/12/11: British cops track rioters through security cameras
• 08/11/11: Relax. There is no Death Star
• 08/10/11: House pages run final errands
• 08/09/11: U.S. treading water on job creation
• 08/08/11: Uncle Sam, the world's permanent guest
• 08/05/11: Most 9/11 victims not on federal death records
• 08/04/11: Russian PM calls U.S. a parasite. He should be so lucky
• 08/03/11: Congress goes from one bind to another
• 08/02/11: D.B. Cooper may no longer be a mystery
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• 07/29/11: He'll always be known as Hot Wheels Handler
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• 07/05/11: Stranded tourists get rare treat
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• 06/27/11: The hangman doesn't cometh
© 2011, SCRIPPS HOWARD NEWS SERVICE
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