February 10, 2012 Rabbi Nathan Lopes Cardozo: The biblical case against small-mindedness involved diminishing His precious prophet Caroline B. Glick: The Peace Process is over. Finally Lisa M. Krieger: Man with defibrillator demands access to his own heart's information David G. Savage: Why activists may not be in a hurry to have High Court rule on alternative marriage Rachel Koning Beals: Gen X Women Continue to Shrink Gender Investing Gap The Kosher Gourmet by Faith Durand: Who Says You Can't Make Restaurant Favorites at Home?: MANGO AND STICKY RICE February 9, 2012 Jeff Strickler: An argument a day keeps the divorce away, they say Clifford D. May: CAIR's Crusade against The Third Jihad Melissa Healy: Study finds jolt to the brain boosts memory Laura McMullen: 10 Least Expensive Public Schools for Out-of-State Students Kimberly Palmer: How to actually enjoy -- relaxing, financially -- your vacation Emily Brandon: 10 Necessities for a Great Retirement Spot The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington: Winter Squash and Red Swiss Chard Risotto is Colorful Cozy Cold Weather Fare (includes detailed dos and don'ts) February 8, 2012 Rivy Poupko Kletenik: Tree hostility: The auspicious history of the evolution of Tu B'Shevat Steven Emerson: Planting Trees is Racist?! Warren Richey: Why momentous Prop. 8 ruling might not satisfy gay-rights groups Anne Applebaum: Russia's Potemkin democracy Menachem Wecker: Though Controversial, LL.M.'s Can Lead to Specialized Legal Jobs Emily Brandon: 10 Necessities for a Great Retirement Spot The Kosher Gourmet byDana Velden: Going to the bother of making soup? You know it better be good. This CREAM OF TOMATO SOUP certainly is! And it's a cinch to make, too (Includes techinques and serving secrets) February 7, 2012 Kathleen Hennessey and Christi Parsons: Obama not worried that birth-control move will hurt his re-election chances with Catholics, other faithful Caroline B. Glick: Obama's rhetorical storm Frank J. Gaffney, Jr.: Caught off-guard? President's Super Bowl interview with Matt Lauer gives those who need a reason not to vote for him, a darn good one Suzanne Bohan: Leaping lizards! 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Glick: Fool me twice Jonathan Tobin : Adelsonphobia Strikes in Nevada Caucus Edmund Sanders : Israeli official says Iran is creating missile that could reach East Coast of US Kimberly Palmer : 8 Ways to Get Ready for Retirement Now Victoria Kim: Immigrant-smuggling ring used black drivers to avoid racial profiling The Kosher Gourmet by Faith Durand: A quick cookie recipe: Hazelnut and Olive Oil Shortbread: Sweet, Nutty, and Savory February 2, 2012 Rabbi Yaakov Rosenblatt : Welcome Home, Governor Perry Jim Carney: Wrong number call may have saved her life Reza Kahlili : Ex-CIA spy in Iran's Revolutionary Guard: What Obama doesn't grasp about striking deals with Tehran Kelsey Sheehy : 5 Tips for Choosing an M.B.A. Concentration Rachel Koning Beals : Investors Increasingly Tap Social Media for Stock Tips Tina Susman: For woodchuck rescuer, every day is Groundhog Day The Kosher Gourmet by Leela Cyd Ross : Savory vegetable pie is a taste of European bistro with minimal effort and maximal flavor February 1, 2012 Nara Schoenberg: What to do when you've been dissed Michelle Malkin: First, They Came for the Catholics Brian Bennett: US officials see increasing threat of domestic attack from Iran Lisa M. Krieger: Possible breakthrough in preventing Alzheimer's Emily Brandon: How to Take Advantage of New 401(k) Fee Disclosures Susan Johnston: 5 Apps for Organizing Your Expenses at Tax Time The Kosher Gourmet by Mario Batali: The famed chef's Broccoli and White Bean Soup can easily be a lunch in itself, or a nice antipasto --- and is hard to mess up January 31, 2012 Paul Greenberg: Separation of Church and State works two ways Caroline B. Glick: Hamas and the Washington establishment Frank J. 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Need we say more? January 25, 2012 Andrew Silow-Carroll: Speak politics the Jewish way! Richard Simon: House passes two bills endorsing the use of religious symbols at military memorials Fred Weir: Putin: Multiethnic Russia cannot survive as a US-style 'melting pot'; must find its own way Susan Johnston: 5 Sneaky Coupon Strategies Consumers Should Watch Out For Menachem Wecker: Adding an extra 'm' -- marriage -- to that M.B.A. Melissa Healy: Harnessing shrooms' magic The Kosher Gourmet by Hilary Meyer: 3 Secrets Leave All of the Comfort in this 'Comfort Food', but few of the Calories January 24, 2012 Carol Clark: The price of your soul: How your brain decides whether to 'sell out' Caroline B. Glick: America lost most in 'Arab Spring'. Sadly, many voters still don't grasp the extent Warren Richey: Drug criminal scores win in GPS ruling from conservative-leaning high court Jada A. Graves: 6 Careers to Watch in 2012 Jason Koebler: Who Should Have Access to Student Records? 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May: How terrorists lose their stigma Suzanne Bohan: Vanquishing social anxieties without drugs Lisa Fernandez and Sean Webby: In alternative lifestyle, domestic violence means men as victims and women being abusers Danielle Kurtzleben: The 10 Best Cities for Finding a Job The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington: Three bean soup with gremolata January 18, 2012 Edward I. Koch: Why the Crocodile Tears, Hillary? David G. Savage: Supreme Court to Principals: You have been warned George Friedman of Stratfor: Iran, the U.S. and the Strait of Hormuz Crisis Jason Koebler: 'Holy Grail' of Flu Vaccines by Next Year Alex M. Parker: The Off-the-Radar Congressional Targets of 2012 The Kosher Gourmet by Susan Russo: Got soft apples? Make Apple-Maple Walnut Breakfast Quinoa January 17, 2012 Frank J. Gaffney Jr.: No-kidding red lines: U.S. response to an Iranian nuke may be bluster, but Israel's won't be David G. Savage: They sued their principals after slandering them online --- now the cases are headed to the Supreme Court Sharon Palmer, R.D.: Believe it or not, your cuppa joe offers potential health perks David Francis: Where to Invest in 2012: With stocks expected to rebound, opportunity abounds for investors Confronting the Car Nerds on their home turf --- the Detroit Auto Show (VIDEO; 3 minutes) The Kosher Gourmet by Emma Christensen: Eleventh-Hour Freezer Pasta, Made Interesting: Ravioli with romesco sauce; Tortellini salad with apples and walnuts January 13, 2012 Chief Rabbi Dr. Warren Goldstein: Expansion Of Spirit (PROFOUND yet UPLIFTING) Ben Lynfield: Israeli lawmakers move to annex Jewish Judea, one museum at a time Rachel Koning Beals:Top Complaints About Daily Deal Sites --- how to avoid missteps Alexia Elejalde-Ruiz: Thriving through touch: Gentle massage helps older people with low mobility improve in mind and body The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington: Braised Oxtail Stew with Olives January 12, 2012 Warren Richey: Landmark Supreme Court ruling a 'resounding win' for religious groups Warren Richey: Supreme Court says no to new rule on eyewitness testimony Ken Dilanian and David S. Cloud: In secret study, CIA and 15 other U.S. intelligence agencies warn Obama against leaving Afghanistan too soon John Fauber : Statins found to raise diabetes risk in postmenopausal women Katy Hopkins : Consider This Before You Pay for an Online Degree Menachem Wecker : 4 Technology Must Haves for Online Students The Kosher Gourmet by Joseph Erdos: This mushroom and barley soup has an intense -- almost nutty -- flavor that mixes robust with Middle East. It has creaminess without cream January 11, 2012 Shari Roan: Millions of atrial fibrillation sufferers at risk for devastating, but preventable, stroke Tom Hussain: Pakistan -- recipient of more than $21 billion in civilian and military aid -- speeds pursuit of Iranian pipeline, defying US David G. Savage: High court signals it won't be loosening TV's 'indecency' rules Stephen Ceasar: Oklahoma's Islamic law amendment can't go into effect, court rules Rachel Koning Beals: Should You Invest in Bond Funds or Individual Issues? 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Jewish World Review April 26, 2005 / 17 Nisan, 5765 Rin Tin Tin Ate My Homework By Joel Stein http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Of all the things I will be held accountable for in hell, this will surprise me the least: Writing a part for an 11-year-old in my sitcom pilot. When Satan shows me the "E! True Hollywood Story" with the innocent child we helped turn into a 19-year-old in rehab, performing with a bad heavy metal band and divorced from a Playmate, I can only pray I'll have made a truckload of syndication money off him. As I was feeling guilty, I noticed a dressing room on the set with a yellow sign that said "Schoolroom." At least our kid, Bret Loehr, was being taught. But just to make sure, I spent Tuesday in class with him. I was pleased to find that Mrs. Schlaifer, who turned 71 this month, runs a tight ship. She's been an on-set teacher since 1965 and has instructed Jodie Foster, Elijah Wood, Helen Hunt, Sarah Jessica Parker and the entire cast of "What's Happening!" She now works with the 8-year-old girl on "Still Standing," after having taught the "Still Standing" mom, Jami Gertz, on "Square Pegs" in 1982. Hollywood is just like a small town for super-rich, good-looking people. Bret, who goes to public school, was catching up on the three weeks he's missed since doing our show right after shooting a movie. Legally, Bret has to go to our school for three hours a day, which I thought was kind of lax until Mrs. Schlaifer explained that it was intense, one-on-one instruction. I figured if you subtracted gym, lunch, study hall and fruitlessly passing notes to find out if Kerri Holt liked me, I got about 45 minutes of actual learning. We started with a spelling lesson involving prefixes and suffixes. About halfway in, Bret was interrupted by our costume designer to pick out a necklace for his character. Then his mom stopped in to give him his mail. Marilu Henner, who's playing his mom, dropped by to tell us a story about how her kids were on-set schooled when she was with the tour of "Annie, Get Your Gun." In Reno, they had to hold school at a cocktail bar, where the teacher taught fractions by having the first-grade kids learn drink recipes on the back of a napkin. Seriously, I am going to hell. After Bret impressed me by calculating the ratio of degrees in a circle to percentages in a pie chart, he bolted out of his chair in the Hollywood equivalent of kids rushing to the window to see if it was snowing. "Was that Whoopi Goldberg?" he yelled. As it turned out, it was only the Hollywood equivalent of rain. The most shocking part of the day was when Mrs. Schlaifer went over the social studies lesson Bret was missing at school that week. On the wipe-board were these questions: "What is the Bhagavad-Gita?" and "What is karma? When does rebirth cease?" I was starting to feel better. Apparently, school at a sitcom isn't worse than any other school in California. At 2 p.m., Bret was joined at school by 13-year-old Ben Zobrist, who I realized had been dragged into this sordid affair because I wrote a joke about having a high school student barf. Yes, Ben was missing school for a barf joke. Dante didn't even envision a circle for that. Ben told me that Mrs. Schlaifer's school was much better than the other on-set schools he'd attended. "This has been the most teaching I've ever gotten. Most of them don't teach you. It's like baby-sitting," he said. On the WB's "Jack & Bobby," he said, "one teacher just went in the other room and started reading." I was surprised that teachers on WB series know how to read. Ben was taking a break from his schoolwork to read a book from the "Left Behind" series. He kept looking at me as if he knew where I was going after the apocalypse. I briefly considered enhancing his barf with a line. Bret had similar on-set stories. "One movie I did, the teacher slept on the set every day," he said. Still, he told me that Ray Liotta taught him a lot about craft. "A lot of the teachers are more interested in getting into the business," Mrs. Schlaifer, explained. Mrs. Schlaifer, a former public school teacher in Manhattan Beach, was dedicated. Not only does she have to teach, but she needs to be on set with us to make sure we don't illegally overwork Bret. And she has to make sure that Bret's mom likes her. "Being of no production value, if you disagree with the mother, she can have you fired," she said. I assured her that Bret's mom is too busy mouthing all Bret's lines as he says them to fire her. Mrs. Schlaifer told me that she's going to retire as soon as "Still Standing" goes off the air. "When I finally retire, I'm writing a book," she said. Then she added, "Actually, probably a screenplay." At least it took her 40 years to be corrupted. Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here. Joel Stein is a Los Angeles Times columnist. Comment by clicking here. 04/18/05 For an Intergalactic Wedgie, Stand Right Here 04/12/05 Drew, Babaloo, Barf and Boston 04/05/05 I regret finally learning ‘how to get to Sesame Street’ 03/21/05 Counting curses and blunt-force injuries © 2005 Los Angeles Times Distributed by Los Angeles Times Syndicate

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