Home
In this issue

Jonathan Tobin: Defending the Right to a Jewish State

Heather Hale: Compliment your kids without giving them big heads

Megan Shauri: 10 ways you are ruining your own happiness

Carolyn Bigda: 8 Best Dividend Stocks for 2015

Kiplinger's Personal Finance editors: 7 Things You Didn't Know About Paying Off Student Loans

Samantha Olson: The Crucial Mistake 55% Of Parents Are Making At Their Baby's Bedtime

Densie Well, Ph.D., R.D. Open your eyes to yellow vegetables

The Kosher Gourmet by Megan Gordon With its colorful cache of purples and oranges and reds, COLLARD GREEN SLAW is a marvelous mood booster --- not to mention just downright delish
April 18, 2014

Rabbi Yonason Goldson: Clarifying one of the greatest philosophical conundrums in theology

Caroline B. Glick: The disappearance of US will

Megan Wallgren: 10 things I've learned from my teenagers

Lizette Borreli: Green Tea Boosts Brain Power, May Help Treat Dementia

John Ericson: Trying hard to be 'positive' but never succeeding? Blame Your Brain

The Kosher Gourmet by Julie Rothman Almondy, flourless torta del re (Italian king's cake), has royal roots, is simple to make, . . . but devour it because it's simply delicious

April 14, 2014

Rabbi Dr Naftali Brawer: Passover frees us from the tyranny of time

Greg Crosby: Passing Over Religion

Eric Schulzke: First degree: How America really recovered from a murder epidemic

Georgia Lee: When love is not enough: Teaching your kids about the realities of adult relationships

Cameron Huddleston: Freebies for Your Lawn and Garden

Gordon Pape: How you can tell if your financial adviser is setting you up for potential ruin

Dana Dovey: Up to 500,000 people die each year from hepatitis C-related liver disease. New Treatment Has Over 90% Success Rate

Justin Caba: Eating Watermelon Can Help Control High Blood Pressure

The Kosher Gourmet by Joshua E. London and Lou Marmon Don't dare pass over these Pesach picks for Manischewitz!

April 11, 2014

Rabbi Hillel Goldberg: Silence is much more than golden

Caroline B. Glick: Forgetting freedom at Passover

Susan Swann: How to value a child for who he is, not just what he does

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Financial Tasks You Should Tackle Right Now

Sandra Block and Lisa Gerstner: How to Profit From Your Passion

Susan Scutti: A Simple Blood Test Might Soon Diagnose Cancer

Chris Weller: Have A Slow Metabolism? Let Science Speed It Up For You

The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington Whitefish Terrine: A French take on gefilte fish

April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review March 16, 2015

The News in Zingers

By Argus Hamilton





http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Alex Rodriguez smashed his first home run in spring training Wednesday, serving notice on the N.Y. Yankees front office that he's going to be expensive this year. That's because his contract is laden with performance bonuses. If Alex strikes out a hundred times, he gets a government windmill subsidy.

The Alcohol and Tobacco Tax and Trade Bureau approved Palcohol Thursday, which is alcohol in powdered form that you're supposed to mix with water. Not everyone reads the instructions on the packet. During the mandatory government testing process, Charlie Sheen nearly destroyed his sinuses.

Hillary Clinton flew to high-tech Silicon Valley to speak to eBay workers Thursday. She doesn't believe you can put two e-mail addresses on one device and she wants to be their president. That's okay, under the Continuity of Government Act, presidents can never know what they're talking about.

Scott Walker met Beverly Hills donors last week as Marco Rubio landed a Mitt Romney staffer while Jeb Bush continued raising money. It doesn't affect the GOP nomination process. No one's going to be nominated til they all ride a horse and we see which one looks the most like Ronald Reagan.



Iranian soldiers led Iraqi soldiers into battle and recaptured Saddam Hussein's hometown of Tikrit from ISIS. Our last enemy was led by our next enemy and defeated our current enemy. Things are going so much smoother ever since the Obamacare website team moved over to Pentagon planning.

Secretary of Defense Ashton Carter told Congress Wednesday that ISIS is metastasizing outside of Syria and Iraq. He's a theoretical physicist. President Obama wants to know how we can theoretically put one hundred thousand U.S. troops back into the Middle East without their boots touching the ground.

Fidel Castro told students in Havana that Barack Obama was brilliant in how he got health care reform passed but he added that Obama is a capitalist-imperialist. He's a real wordsmith. Leave it to Fidel Castro to be able to say something that makes both Democrats and Republicans proud of Obama.

Hillary Clinton explained Tuesday she used private e-mail because she didn't want to carry one smartphone for private and one for business which got a huge laugh from young people. This is a switch. After twenty-five years, we finally have a Clinton scandal that your kids have to explain to YOU.

Hillary Clinton flubbed a press conference intended to explain why she used private e-mail to conduct foreign policy. She said she deleted any e-mails she deemed private and declared she won't surrender the server. Harrison Ford sounded better assuring the tower that he had the runway in sight.

Hillary Clinton took questions about her e-mail scandal at a U.N. press conference Tuesday. Her party leaders rallied to her side afterwards. Being a Democrat means insisting that Hillary Clinton's private e-mails are her own business while conceding that Bill Clinton's sex life is everybody's business.

Utah's legislature passed a law allowing capital punishment by firing squad if Utah has trouble getting lethal injection drugs. The European patent-holder of the liquid lethal cocktail will no longer sell it to U.S. states. Vladimir Putin always carries the antidote in case somebody switches drinks on him.

The Alcohol and Tobacco Tax and Trade Bureau on Wednesday approved the sale of powdered alcohol to the public. That's a start. Now if we can just get alcohol approved in crack form, L.A. can have the sentencing disparities between whites and blacks causing civil unrest and free Apple products.

The Colorado Rockies made history Monday announcing they will sell marijuana brownies at the concession stands at their home games in Denver this year. It could improve the officiating of the game. If the umpires eat these brownies between innings, no one can blame glaucoma for the bad calls.

Tim Tebow is training with Tom Brady's quarterback coach to improve his passing for the NFL veterans scouting combine in Phoenix next week. His odyssey has really matured him. When Tim Tebow sees people kneeling on New York subways, he now knows they're not praying, they're wounded.


Archives

Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.

JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements. Comment by clicking here.


© 2011, Argus Hamilton

Columnists

Toons

Lifestyles

Quantcast