Jewish World Review March 20, 2012/ 26 Adar, 5772
The News in Zingers
By Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | George Clooney led protests at Sudan's Embassy in Washington D.C. Friday. He spent the week rubbing elbows with politicians, lobbyists and the president. After two days in Washington he couldn't wait to return to the relative depth and sincerity of Los Angeles.
CBS Sports enjoyed big ratings for the NCAA Tournament due to college basketball's popularity on Saturday. It's so different from the NBA. The players go all out for the entire game and referees have no idea how the game's going to come out before it's played.
Tiger Woods dropped out of the Doral WGC after the twelfth hole Sunday. Helicopter cams followed him as he drove away with golfer Webb Simpson. When NBC announced he was in an SUV with Simpson going up the freeway the police put out an APB for Tiger's ex-wife.
The Washington Post reports Osama bin Laden had ordered al-Qaeda to shoot down President Obama's plane so Joe Biden could become president. His reasoning was simple. He thought Joe Biden was unprepared to be president because he never lived in Indonesia.
President Obama revealed his NCAA bracket picks in an ESPN special along with his Final Four selections Thursday. It caused eyes to roll. Energy companies complained that it was just another example of the federal government picking the winners and losers.
Iran president Mahmoud Ahmadinejad was called to the Council of Mullahs Tuesday and rebuked. They want a new president. If the mullahs wants someone who can make Israel give up half of what they own, they should swap their nuclear program for Bernie Madoff.
Prime Minister David Cameron met with Wall Street chiefs Thursday. Talks focused on the need to remove barriers to trans-Atlantic capital flow. They want to take a half second off the one second it takes for cash to go from New York to London to the Bahamas.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements. Comment by clicking here.
© 2011, Argus Hamilton