Jewish World Review March 29, 2011 / 23 Adar II, 5771
And now for the important news ....
By Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Charlie Sheen fired his literary agent Friday for failing to land him the ten million dollar book deal he was demanding for his autobiography. His shows are selling out everywhere. According to research, Charlie Sheen is popular with teenagers with a rebellious streak, young men who use drugs, and comedians with mortgages.
Reagan National Airport's control tower went silent Thursday after an air traffic controller fell asleep in the tower. The pilots were on their own. All they had for guidance was President Obama's statement that we must protect the civilians in Libya.
Hillary Clinton announced on television Thursday that the U.S. would cede authority in Libya to NATO after U.N. Ambassador Susan Rice demanded that Moammar Khadaffi step down. The president allowed them to take the lead on this. The Obama administration considers war a last resort, and women's work.
Senator Jay Rockefeller sent a letter to the White House Friday demanding an explanation from the president as to our goal and strategy for going into Libya. What's wrong with him? When the great-grandson of the founder of Standard Oil doesn't understand why we're in Libya, it's like the rest of us forgetting the Pledge of Allegiance.
Moammar Khadaffi gave everybody in the Libyan military and Tripoli police department a promotion of one rank on Friday. It might work. Protests against the Iraq war in the United States abruptly ended four years ago when everybody got a reality show.
The White House called members of Congress Friday to brief them on the goal of the mission in Libya. The public won't be in the dark about it for long. Apple just came out with a new app that tells us why our troops are in any country you click on.
President Obama insisted Friday that his military intention in Libya is for humanitarian aid and not for regime change. It didn't affect his poll numbers one way or the other. President Obama's approval rating stays in the forties like it's a rent-controlled apartment.
Germany's Reichstag voted Friday to end the military draft and go with an all-volunteer army for the first time in seventy-five years. It's the wave of the future. If it works as well for them as it has for us, they'll be invading countries again, three at a time.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements. Comment by clicking here.
© 2009, Argus Hamilton