Jewish World Review March 16, 2007 / 26 Adar, 5767
And now for the important news ....
By Argus Hamilton
New York holds the St. Patrick's Day Parade in Manhattan Saturday. The mood is sad this year. Scientists just discovered that the Irish and English have the same Y chromosome, ruining centuries of tribal hatred and making Notre Dame-Southern Methodist just another game.
The NCAA tournament was reported on Monday to be the top betting event of the year with sixty billion dollars wagered. Some of these odds-makers are just phenomenal. Several years ago, one guy had William Shatner's wife in the pool a month before she drowned.
Miami Airport said Monday its security guards this year have seized nine tons of booze and perfume in oversized bottles. It's best to keep that stuff off airplanes. The Mile High Club's already so crowded you can hardly get a tee time in the lavatory.
Joint Chiefs Chairman Gen. Peter Pace said Monday he thinks homosexuality is immoral and should not be allowed in the military. He said it's no different than adultery. The next morning, Rudy Giuliani, Newt Gingrich and Bill Clinton challenged him to a fight in the schoolyard.
Rudy Giuliani defended Newt Gingrich's adultery confession Monday while John McCain urged that private lives be off-limits during this campaign. The three of them have eight wives between them. This year if you see Republican candidates discuss the sanctity of marriage, it will be comedians impersonating them on Saturday Night Live.
Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.
JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements.
Comment by clicking here.
© 2007, Argus Hamilton