Jewish World Review March 10, 2006 / 10 Adar, 5766
And now for the important news ....
By Argus Hamilton
Donald Trump said Tuesday his daughter Ivanka is so pretty
he would probably date her if they weren't related. His intentions
were actually very clear. If G-d thinks he's a hillbilly it gives
him a better shot at winning the Powerball Lottery.
Jerry Jones led talks Tuesday to try to force NFL owners to
spend money more competitively. They now live in a system of
revenue sharing. If it were any more fair and equal, a Republican
would urge Mr. Tagliabue to tear down this contract.
Supreme Court Justice Stephen Breyer revealed Tuesday
there's been a lot more discussion during court deliberations
since the new guys got there. He said he believes it's because
they are younger. You know how people talk when they're awake.
North Korea accidentally fired two missiles Wednesday, sparking safety concerns on the American West Coast. Los Angeles has no early warning system for nuclear radiation. Civil Defense is simply monitoring George Hamilton for early blistering.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
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© 2006, Argus Hamilton