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May 9, 2008

Rabbi Abraham J. Twerski: Reverence, Yes; Worship, No

Mona Charen: Did Israel Drive Out the Arabs 60 Years Ago?

JWisdom: Ultimate opportunities by Rabbi Sroy Levitansky

May 8, 2008

Rabbi Nathan Lopes Cardozo: Israel at 3,500+

Jonathan Tobin: Still Fighting the Same War

Steven Plaut: How ‘nakba’ proves the fiction of a Palestinian Nation

JWisdom: Taking Israel for Granted? by Rabbi Mordechai Becher

May 7, 2008

Rabbi Hillel Goldberg: Israel is irrelevant to the Israeli-Palestinian conflict

Dion Nissenbaum: Latest Olmert scandal could derail efforts to force Israel's compromises

JWisdom: My Inner Ventriloquist by Sara Yoheved Rigler

May 6, 2008

Caroline B. Glick: Anti-Zionism at 60

The Kosher Gourmet By Ethel G. Hofman: In honor of Israel's 60th anniversary, the former president of the International Association of Culinary Professionals, whose members included the likes of Julia Child, is back with a smorgasbord featuring the taste and essence of the Jewish homeland

JWisdom: Holocaust in the Perspective of Faith by Rabbi Nosson Scherman: Jewish Deer in Nazi Headlights

May 5, 2008

The Jewish Ethicist by Rabbi Dr. Asher Meir: Busy work

Jonathan Mark: Remarkable half-century old Mike Wallace interview with Abba Eban puts current anti-Israel sentiment into perspective

May 2, 2008

Rabbi Berel Wein: Rote religiosity

Caroline B. Glick: Whitewashing Hamas

JWisdom: Parent trap?

May 1, 2008

David Zwiebel: Faith communities can learn from Orthodox Jews in stimulating private philanthropy for religious education

George Friedman and Peter Zeihan of Stratfor: The Shift Toward an Israeli-Syrian Agreement

JWisdom: It's time to wake up by Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis

April 30, 2008

Jonathan Tobin: Pennsylvania's Democratic slugfest may leave some Jewish votes up for grabs

The Kosher Gourmet by Linda Gassenheimer: Fresh herbs, sauteed veal and tiny creamer potatoes makes a light spring dinner

JWisdom: How to Build a Mentch by Rabbi Mordechai Becher

April 29, 2008

Daniel Pipes: Barack Obama's Muslim Childhood

Joel Brinkley: On human rights, the U.N. once again strikes out

JWisdom: Holocaust in the Perspective of Faith by Rabbi Nosson Scherman: When The Truth is Unbelievable

April 28, 2008

The Jewish Ethicist by Rabbi Dr. Asher Meir: Q: I'm often stuck in the doctor's waiting room for hours! Doesn't he owe me something for my wasted time?

Steven Emerson: New U.S. government policy advises agencies to avoid using some of the very same words that make up terror groups' names

JWisdom: Why You & I Never Die: A Jewish View of Immortality, Part I by Rabbi David Aaron

April 25, 2008

Rabbi Mitchell Wohlberg: Schadenfreude isn't kosher for Passover --- or at any other time

Rabbi Berel Wein: The secret of how the data bank of memory is transferred from one generation to the next

JWisdom: Stepping Up to A Higher Spiritual Life by Rabbi Lawrence Kelemen, Part III

April 24, 2008

Rabbi Nathan Lopes Cardozo: The successful failure

Fred Burton and Scott Stewart of Stratfor: Placing the terrorist threat to the food supply in perspective

JWisdom: Stepping Up to A Higher Spiritual Life by Rabbi Lawrence Kelemen, Part II

April 23, 2008

Connie Ogle: An intricate game of a novel

Jonathan Tobin: Making Sense of the 'J Street' Jive

JWisdom: Stepping Up to A Higher Spiritual Life by Rabbi Lawrence Kelemen

April 22, 2008

Jonathan Rosenblum: Why Israel's 'Leaven law' matters

Caroline B. Glick: Obama the Savior

April 18, 2008

Rabbi Harvey Belovski: Multimedia tool of antiquity

Caroline B. Glick: Revealed Truths vs. revealed lies

JWisdom: More than miracles by Rabbi Sroy Levitansky

April 17, 2008

Rabbi Avi Shafran: Deconstructing Dayeinu

Rabbi Elazar Meisels: Is innovation at the Seder a slap at tradition?

JWisdom: Discovering Your Divine Mission, Part III by Rabbi David Aaron

April 16, 2008

Jonathan Tobin: A Prayer for Sderot's Children

Ethel G. Hofman: Sumptuous Seder

JWisdom: The Divine is in the details by Rabbi Mordechai Becher

April 15, 2008

Rabbi Dovid Zauderer: Let Charlton Heston Go!

Frank J. Gaffney, Jr.: Jimma, tyranny's enabler

JWisdom: Relationships: Beyond Mars & Venus, Part IV by Dr. Lisa Aiken

April 14, 2008

The Jewish Ethicist by Rabbi Dr. Asher Meir: The Snitching Supervisor

Jonathan Tobin: Forget the Fun and Games!

JWisdom: Sincerity is Valued Most by Rabbi Abraham J. Twerski, M.D.

April 11, 2008

Rabbi David Gutterman: A Mystery in the Middle East

Caroline B. Glick: Why Ahmadinejad smiles

JWisdom: Elevated illness by Rabbi Sroy Levitansky

April 10, 2008

Stratfor Intelligence Briefing by George Friedman: A Mystery in the Middle East

The Kosher Gourmet By Steve Petusevsky: The spring elegance of asparagus

JWisdom: Holocaust in the Perspective of Faith by Rabbi Nosson Scherman: The Power of Rational Lies

April 9, 2008

Michael Feldberg: An all but forgotten Colonial doctor who put his Jewish values before his life

Jordan "Gorf" Gorfinkel's "Everything's Relative" gets philosophical

JWisdom: Four Rabbis in Bnei Brak by Rabbi Mordechai Becher

April 8, 2008

Caroline Glick: Covering for the enemy

Elliot B. Gertel: 'House' goes Hasidic

JWisdom: Relationships: Beyond Mars & Venus, Part III by Dr. Lisa Aiken

April 7, 2008

The Jewish Ethicist by Rabbi Dr. Asher Meir: Q: I have a translating business. Recently someone asked me to translate some financial documents that are clearly forged. Should I agree?

Jonathan Rosenblum : Israel is unwittingly helping to fuel the international campaign of delegitimization against it

JWisdom: Matzah and leaven as a life philosophy by Rabbi Abraham J. Twerski, M.D.

April 4, 2008

Rabbi Abraham J. Twerski: The Mystery of Suffering

Caroline B. Glick: Fear of democracy

JWisdom: Dirty Jews by Rabbi Sroy Levitansky

April 3, 2008

Rabbi Y. Y. Rubinstein: Parents --- and the children who would be them

The Kosher Gourmet by Kathy Manweiler: Tempted by restaurant dressings? Don't be. Here are recipes that can be made at home, healthier!

JWisdom: The importance of retaining a 'slave mentality' by Rabbi Mordechai Becher

April 2, 2008

Mitch Albom: Child abuse, disguised as faith

Jonathan Tobin: Unreasonable Accommodations

JWisdom: Holocaust in the Perspective of Faith with Rabbi Nosson Scherman: Eliminating Jewish Influence over Germans

March 22, 2007

J-Rhythms with Avraham Rosenblum: JWR's cutting-edge music program showcasing performers -- singers, song writers, musicians, and bands -- who learn and live the Torah lifestyle (OUR NEWEST IGODCAST !)

Oct. 29, 2003
Mortimer B. Zuckerman: Graffiti On History's Walls (MUST-READ!)

Jewish World Review March 24, 2005 / 13 Adar II, 5765

Baywatch Babe Baskets and Eminem's evil Israeli twin

By Andrea Simantov


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Purim in Jerusalem is a time for creativity



http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | For the last three months, the sixteen-year-old son had been sporting a knitted ski hat, his long black lashes barely visible beneath the woolly edge. Everything about him had, lately, appeared shadowed and secretive, and I constantly worried about disenfranchisement, potential drug-use, criminal involvements which lay far-beyond my area of mommy-expertise.


At a height of 6'3", his clothes had become baggier and the attitude more sullen. The appearance of two eclectic piercings did little to assuage a general sense that I was losing my son. Having been a former, devoted subscriber to Parents Magazine and current Oprah.Com groupie, it behooved me to ask whether or not I even knew my son!


On the other hand, he was staying at home more and more, doing well in his studies, actually assisting his younger sister with her term paper, and once took out the garbage after only six requests. He plays Scrabble with me when the Sabbath weather is inclement and still knows which fork to use for gefilte fish. But the woolly head covering was really getting to me. Unable to bear the suspense any longer, I finally blurted out, "O.K. What's with the hat?"


"What hat?" he queried back, sounding a little like Eminem's evil Israeli twin.


"That bad-looking rapper-rag which is covering your lush and blessedly-inherited head curls, that's which hat."


"This hat?" he responded. I have to give it to him. He can really keep a conversation pumping.


"I'm growing my hair for Purim. All the guys in school are. We're doing dread-locks and bleaching them blond. I told you about it."


Admittedly, my memory isn't what it used to be. And yet I still maintain that the data regarding a former yeshiva bochur's plan to costume himself as a Vanilla Bob Marley would have, somehow, remained in "storage." The vision of him walking into shul (synagogue) wearing this get-up would have held a unique place in my internal trauma closet.


Purim is a big, BIG deal around here. Everyone wears costumes, even the bank tellers and bus drivers. When the kids asked me that evening over a gourmet supper of Corn Flakes and canned beans what I planned on being this year, I resisted the urge to mutter, "A Baywatch Babe." Not that I couldn't pull it off, mind you. It's just that in my fervently-Orthodox neighborhood, no one — including us — owns a television, and all of that creativity would be wasted.


Feeling pressured by the looming holiday, it was time to give some serious thought to the preparation of Mishloach Manos (Purim gift baskets). Every year the competition was growing steeper and steeper — NOT by the amounts of money spent but by the unbridled creativity of some of the other neighbor gals. Whatever happened to the standard "two-hamentaschen/six jelly-beans/mini-bottle-of-grape juice/three walnuts and a rotten apple" Mishloach Manos? Suddenly everyone's an artiste, a cross between Wilhelm Puck and Martha Stewart, and I'm breaking my head to outdo The Frummie Next Door!


I crawled into our friendly (what else?) crawlspace and hauled out the cobwebbed carton marked "PURIM." Slicing through the yellowed cellophane tape, I grew instantly nostalgic upon seeing the multi-colored Easter grass that had hardened in the airless box. Other memory-stirring items included four wooden graggers (Purim noisemakers) with which to drown out the name of our archenemy Haman, six Books of Esther from which we recount the tale, an aquamarine Afro-wig and a Ronald Reagan mask. But what could I use at this late moment as containers for my artery-clogging culinary masterpieces?


Eureka! With a sudden burst of brain-clearing euphoria, I recalled a Purim four years earlier when I thought myself the Neapolitan Julia Child. That year I had designed Mishloach Manos using an Italian theme, packing each red colander "basket" with a box of authentic linguini, small jar of homemade spaghetti sauce, ribbon-wrapped bread sticks, and mini-bottle of Chianti. Each of the eighty packages was enfolded with a red-and-white checked dishtowel. Tres clever, no?


Yes. Quite. Except for the fact that I was living in a new neighborhood and didn't know anyone upon whom I could bestow these gifts other than an elderly neighbor who had once loaned me an onion. Another thirteen accompanied my six children to school as they curried favor from various sourpuss teachers and secular bus drivers.


Four days after the holiday, the dining room table still groaned under the weight of the remaining sixty-seven Purim packages. With less than four weeks until Passover, I was the stunned possessor of sixty-seven boxes of definitely not-kosher-for-Passover pasta and sixty-seven ribbon-wrapped packets of breadsticks. The only positive aspect to the story is that none of my highly allergic children suffer from wheat intolerance . . .


Four years later with the lesson of over-planning still fresh in my mind, I still have many indestructible red plastic colanders available for the packing. Of course, I no longer have sixty-seven. Some were included in indescribably clever wedding-shower gifts; some disappeared mysteriously as I moved from house to house, perhaps stolen by a not-too-discriminating thief. But there are about eleven remaining. How can I be so certain? Because every time I open up my dairy-pot cabinet, all of them fall out of the warped top shelf and hit me on the head.


Every time.


I still haven't made up my mind as to this year's theme, but I'm getting closer. A "sushi" basket is over-the-top, and I'm not certain I can handle the complications of keeping raw fish cool under a baking Israeli sun. Anything "French" is tricky around here, and I don't want to encourage any wrathful responses to my well-intentioned gift. Deli and appetizing are a little over-budget and, in any case, are becoming passé.


I may, indeed, do a "Baywatch Babe Basket" and let the cultural chips fall where they may. What will I put in this basket? One Slim-Fast snack bar, half of a sand-sprinkled egg salad sandwich, a small tube of zinc oxide for the sun kissed nose, and a warm can of Fresca. Some of them I'll pack in Beach Ball decorated shopping bags.


And the others?


I was thinking about using red plastic colanders.

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JewishWorldReview.com contributor Andrea Simantov is a Jerusalem-based columnist and single mother of six. Comments by clicking here.


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© 2005, Andrea Simantov. This column first appeared in Orange County Jewish Life