Jewish World Review Feb. 11, 2010 / 27 Shevat 5770
And now for the important news ....
By Argus Hamilton
South Carolina's former first lady Jenny Sanford wrote a book about how adultery wrecked her marriage to Governor Mark Sanford. She gave up so much by divorcing him. Jenny Sanford would've been the first lady of the Confederacy if Obama gets re-elected.
Senate Republicans suggested using tax cuts as the way to get out of recession like Jack Kennedy did. He was a great economist. If tax revenues came within one million dollars of balancing the budget he'd make up the rest out of his dad's pocket.
Men's Health magazine named Fresno the drunkest city in America, followed by Bakersfield and San Bernardino. It makes sense. The three cities were settled by Oklahoma cotton farmers fleeing the Dust Bowl, and they vowed they would never suffer another dry day.
Toyota recalled eight models with sticking accelerators Thursday and a hybrid model with bad brakes. Prius owners are just miserable. Not only did they overpay for a car with computer braking problems, but there's no such thing as global warming.
President Obama told Democrats last week that like it or not, America must have a sound financial system. It wasn't his first choice. He just tasted the vegetables Michelle grew on the South Lawn and no one will trade him any cigarettes for them.
President Obama met with House Democrats to plan yet another push for passage of health care reform. The legislation died on Capitol Hill two weeks ago. The Republicans have an alibi, they were all in Massachusetts campaigning for Scott Brown.
President Obama used the National Prayer Breakfast last week to denounce people who question his faith or his citizenship. It's time we get off the president's back in this area. President Obama watches ball games instead of going to church on Sunday and he's got troops all over the world, the man's as British as the rest of us.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements. Comment by clicking here.
© 2009, Argus Hamilton