Home
In this issue
Nov. 23, 2009
JWisdom.com: Actually, it really is all about you with Rabbi Lawrence Hajioff
Nov. 20, 2009
Rabbi David Aaron: How to make every second of your life come first
Caroline B. Glick: Whither American Jewry
Nov. 19, 2009
Binyamin L. Jolkovsky: Please Listen to this Godcast (5 minutes)
Jonathan Tobin: ADL Crosses the Line with Report Bashing Obama Critics
Nov. 18, 2009
Rabbi Yonason Goldson: What Judaism has to say about the secret of the Mona Lisa's smile
JWisdom.com: The (Jewish) Dating Game with Rabbi Lawrence Hajioff (8 minutes)
Nov. 17, 2009
Steven Emerson: How Does the 4th Amendment Impact Terror Finance Investigations?
JWisdom.com: If Frank Sinatra married Edith Piaf with Rabbi Y.Y. Rubinstein (2 minutes) Life lessons from what would be regarded as the most inappropriate lyrics ever sung
Nov. 16, 2009
The Jewish Ethicist by Rabbi Dr. Asher Meir : When borrowing is stealing
JWisdom.com: Deconstructing faith with Rabbi Warren Goldstein (9 minutes)
Nov. 13, 2009
JWisdom.com Sarah's subjective reality with Rabbi Sroy Levitansky ( 6 minutes)
Caroline B. Glick: Obama's failure, Netanyahu's opportunity
Nov. 12, 2009
The Kosher Gourmet By Marialisa Calta : A sweet sweet potato treat
JWisdom.com Does God get tired? with Rabbi Harvey Belovski ( 5 minutes)
Nov. 11, 2009
Rabbi Avi Shafran: Jews and money: When anti-Semitism isn't
JWisdom.com Marriages are not made in Heaven with Rabbi Lawrence Hajioff (VERY fast 15 minutes)
Nov. 10, 2009
Michael Doyle: Author of book exposing CAIR ordered to remove supporting documents from Web
JWisdom.com If the creation so loudly shouts the existence of the Creator, why aren't more people believers? with Rabbi Naftali Brawer (9 minutes)
Nov. 9, 2009
Mark Steyn: Shooter exposes hole in U.S. terror strategy
JWisdom.com It's never too late to have a happy childhood with Sarah Chana Radcliffe (5 minutes)
Nov. 6, 2009
Rabbi Berel Wein: Choosing to hear
JWisdom.com Zero to 1/60th: How to Empower An Hour with Gavriel Aryeh Sande (7 minutes)
Caroline B. Glick The mullahs' big week
Suzanne Fields A Fallen Wall for Fallen Man
Nov. 5, 2009
The Kosher Gourmet: Three scrumptious -- but simple -- butternut squash dishes
JWisdom.com Hidden Hints: Unlocking Faith & Prayer with Rabbi Jay Yaacov Schwartz (10 minutes)
Nov. 4, 2009
Tom Hamburger and Kim Geiger: Should prayers be covered?
JWisdom.com When God played peacemaker With Rabbi Sroy Levitansky (5 minutes)
Nov. 3, 2009
Martin Peretz: Beware, Barack. Beware, Rahm. Beware, Axelrod
JWisdom.com Are you are closet idolater? With Sara Yoheved Rigler (10 minutes)
Nov. 2, 2009
Paul Greenberg: The Holocaust is now on Facebook
JWisdom.com Abraham's Strange Change With Rabbi Yitzchok Fingerer (5 minutes)
Oct. 29, 2003
Mortimer B. Zuckerman: Graffiti On History's Walls (MUST-READ!)

Jewish World Review Feb. 6, 2009 / 11 Shevat 5769

Fred Mertz for vice president

By Celia Rivenbark

Celia Rivenbark
Printer Friendly Version
Email this article


http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | For some nutty reason, I've been picturing the Obamas and the Bidens as the Ricardos and Mertzes lately. They're a fun foursome but it's not always a blissful relationship. One gets the distinct impression that if they went to Hollywood for vacation, the Bidens would, somehow, end up being the ones to land a pie in William Holden's face at The Brown Derby restaurant.


Joe and Jill Biden, both suffering from severe cases of foot-in-mouth, tend to have a lot of 'splainin' to do every time they step out, it seems to me.


Most recently, there was the Missus Biden sitting on Oprah's famous couch and cheerily telling her that Joe could've picked either veep or Secretary of State, it was completely up to him.


Rolling her eyes and clapping her pretty hand over her mouth, we could practically see the ghost of Lucy. Surely, a "Waaaaaaahhhhhh" wasn't far behind. Her husband, the king of gaffes, found himself in the odd position of saying, "Shhhhh" but it wasn't working.


The Bidens, particularly Joe, have a "did I just say that out loud?" mentality about them.


While Obama, the measured, cool and normally unflappable Ricky Ricardo of the bunch, tried to extend olive branches, cross over aisles and every other cliche you can think of to make nice-nice with the Republicans in the first days of his presidency, Joe Biden made a ham-handed jab at Justice Roberts' now famous flubbing of the oath of office.


"My memory is not as good as Justice Roberts'," Biden quipped, sarcasm dripping from each word like, well, something that drips a lot. In a rare show of emotion, Obama's jaw visibly clenched and I could picture him, like Ricky leading Lucy home, sitting Biden down and waving a finger in his face while assuring him there would be no talent night at the Babalu for him.


"Waaaaahhhhh."


I'm guessing that Obama has wondered more than a few times if Biden was the best pick. A jolly, tail-wagging foil for Obama's crisp competency, it's an odd mix, this Lucy and Ricky. It's not that big a stretch, hons. Some of the stuff that Biden comes up with makes it sound as if he's been hitting the Vitameatavegamin pretty hard.


At the Roberts' remark, Obama maintained a steely gaze while discreetly but firmly grabbing Biden's elbow. It's that same gesture that Ricky used to use when Lucy was about to make a pure-T fool of herself in front of Milton Berle. (Ask your parents.) It's the same gesture that every mom I know uses during a church service to get her squirmy kid to be quiet and sit up straight.


Biden won't have any trouble sitting up straight but being quiet is hard for him. Not as hard as packaging candy on an assembly line with a broken conveyor belt, mind you, but still pretty hard.

Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.

Celia Rivenbark is an award-winning news reporter and freelance columnist for The Sun News in Myrtle Beach, S.C. Comment by clicking here.


Women and tools are like grease, water
Runners are a different breed of folk altogether
Don't get all bento out of shape
For you, Princess? I'll buy junk
Gwyneth P. needs big ol' reality check
Reality show amuses yet repels viewer
Spying on kid at summer camp awfully fulfilling
Stars? Great outdoors? I don't think so
Honesty in the name of fashion
Perfect attendance award is for little, viral losers
Trendy new ailment not for everybody
What is wrong with the women today who marry insanely rich and talented men and then think they still have to cook?
Shagadelic on the dance floor
Ex-boyfriends can have the worst timing
Little wonder many voters are confused
Sound bites not easy in Southern
I swear it's not my fault
Celebrity news gets weirder, trumps all else
Driver's license? Outta my way while I get `em
Like taking Miley Cyrus tickets from a baby
Driving under the influence of celebrity
Hugged your Webkinz today?
Hate mail spawned by humor columns
‘High School Musical’ rocks to the max!
Where did latest ‘syndrome’ come from?
Tell the truth, folks, we all love Paris' trauma and drama
Tell the truth, folks, we all love Paris' trauma and drama
Office gossip is protected free speech
First-class corpse
Song lyrics have only gotten dumber
Talk to the clock because the ISP doesn't care
Being a happy human vessel has its limits
Who's not your daddy?
Phoning for dazzlers
Proper spelling begins at home
Sick of the waiting room
Road signs
Halt your motion toward the lotion
Sudoku's got my husband's number
One short stack of smarts, please
Spa me the kids
IRS wants us to like it so much that it smacks of desperation
Uniforms: Soul-sucking sameness
Girls' pajama parties a little different now
Welcome back for guilt-free manly man
A big boo-hoo for disgraced celebs
Girls' pajama parties a little different now
When Bubbas and hoes are extra welcome
Ageless icons can't escape their ages
Gifts to kids' teachers make competitive moms antsy

Kid bumper stickers sure not ‘terrific’

© 2007, The Sun News Distributed by Knight Ridder/Tribune Information Services

Insight (Our Columnists)

 Arnold Ahlert
 Mitch Albom
 Michael Barone
  Dave Barry
 Tony Blankley
 Andy Borowitz
 David Broder
 Stratfor Briefing
 Mona Charen
 Linda Chavez
 Ann Coulter
 Greg Crosby
 Larry Elder
 Suzanne Fields
 John Fund
 Frank J. Gaffney
 Lloyd Garver
 Jonah Goldberg
 Julia Gorin
 Jonathan Gurwitz
 Paul Greenberg
 Lewis Grossberger
 Victor Davis Hanson
 Betsy Hart
 Nat Hentoff
 David Horowitz
 Laura Ingraham
 Cheri Jacobus
Jeff Jacoby
 Paul Johnson
 Jack Kelly
 Ed Koch
 Ch. Krauthammer
 Michael Ledeen
 John Leo
 David Limbaugh
 Kathryn Lopez
 Rich Lowry
 Michelle Malkin
 Jackie Mason
 Dick Morris
 Bill O'Reilly
 Jim Mullen
 Clarence Page
 Kathleen Parker
 Dennis Prager
 Wesley Pruden
 Tom Purcell
 Jonathan Rauch
 Celia Rivenbark
 Robert Robb
 Cokie & Steve Roberts
 Pat Sajak
 Debra J. Saunders
 Culture Shlock
 Roger Simon
 Michael Smerconish
 Thomas Sowell
 Mark Steyn
 John Stossel
 Cal Thomas
 Bob Tyrrell
 Diana West
 Dave Weinbaum
 George Will
 Walter Williams
 Byron York
 Mort Zuckerman

'Toons
 Robert Arial
 Chuck Asay
 Baloo
 Chip Bok
 Dry Bones
  Lisa Benson
 John Branch
 Gary Brookins
 John Cole
 J. D. Crowe
 John Deering
 Brian Duffy
 Everything's Relative
 Mallard Fillmore
 Jake Fuller
 Bob Gorrel
 Joe Heller
 David Hitch
 Jerry Holber
 Steve Kelley
 Jeff Koterba
 Dick Locher
 Chan Lowe
 Ranan R. Lurie
 Jimmy Margulies
 Rick McKee
 Michael Ramirez
 Kevin Siers
 Jeff Stahler
 Ed Stein
 Danna Summers
 John Trever
 Gary Varvel
 Kirk Walters

Lifestyles
 How 2
 Lori Borgman
 The Savvy Consumer
 Elder matters
 Fixit
 Dr. Peter Gott
 GET A JOB! by Marty Nemko
 Richard Lederer
 Tech Maven
 Every Monday Matters
 Nutrition Myths
 Bookmark These
 Bruce Williams
 How Stuff Works