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April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review Jan. 29, 2014/ 28 Shevat, 5774

Bridging the Generation Gap Has Gone Too Far

By Ana Veciana-Suarez



http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | It turns out that the generation gap separating my children from me is not the size of the Grand Canyon but a mere sidewalk crack. Unlike a generation ago, no chasm divides those for whom tattoos are cool and those of us who know that one day someone will pay good money to have them removed.

A Pew Research Center study found that while two-thirds of Americans 16 and older saw an age divide, respondents didn't believe it caused a lot of problems in their families or society. The generational squabble, the report states, "is a much more subdued affair than the one that raged in the 1960s."

The survey also found that today's parents are having fewer serious arguments with their kids in their late teens and early 20s than they had with their own mothers and fathers. In other words, we have mellowed out and opened up. We're not fighting over blaring music -- probably thanks to ear buds and iPods -- nor stressing about work ethic and moral values, at least not publicly.

"This survey," one of the researchers told USA Today, "suggests the generations have discovered they can disagree without being disagreeable."

This is good news for families, of course, and yet a wary peace has its consequences. I can't help but wonder if the separation that existed in the households of our youth didn't made it easier for adults to be parents.

Mothers were mothers; they were not friends or confidantes. They didn't trade clothes with their teenage daughters or share stories about love interests. Roles were separate and defined, softening only when we children joined our parents in adulthood.

"I have to give you something to rebel against," my mother once told me, and believe me, there was plenty that invited revolt back then, from curfews to dress codes.



Now curfews are "so" middle school and 40-somethings dress as if they were stuck in adolescence. Now, too, our children rebel less against us -- no need to -- and more against a world that has proven to be a hundred times harsher than a father's reprimand. Ah, yes, the generational insurgency has relegated us to a second front.

It's not that I'm nostalgic for rigid filial relationships, but there can be such a thing as too much closeness and too few boundaries. For me, maintaining distance is a child-rearing philosophy that evolved over time: The more kids I had, the more I recognized the necessity of clear divisions, of parents being parents and children children.

As I grew more confident, I also drew on my parents' example. Growing up, for instance, I knew that, no matter how rebellious the times or justified the causes, there was a line I could not cross. Ultimately, being part of the family was the most important thing. Now that belief seems quaint.

Don't misunderstand. I'm all for bridging the generations. Chasms create rancor, but some friction, stoked gently, can also go a long way toward instilling respect.

Comment by clicking here.

Ana Veciana-Suarez is a family columnist for The Miami Herald


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