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Feb. 8, 2013
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Jewish World Review
Jan 13, 2012/ 18 Teves, 5772
Not exactly a biblical plague, but certainly an annoyance
By
Dale McFeatters
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
G0d expressed his displeasure through the 10 plagues of Egypt, and it always pays to be alert to signs of G0d's wrath.
In my neighborhood, there is much to arouse suspicion. There are gnats, mosquitoes and flies, but then we live next to two streams, near the stagnant waters of the C&O Canal and not far from the Potomac River. Frogs, not so much anymore.
Washington seems to be visited by seven-year locusts annually, and they are deafening, but you get used to them. And in any case, the deer are more of a threat to the capital shrubbery than the locusts. (I know. Technically, cicadas are not locusts, but when it's your story you can tell it your way.)
There's thunder and occasional hail, but our weather's been increasingly quirky the last couple of years whether because of G0d, global warming or sunspots, who knows. There's darkness, but then it is the dead of winter. And our first-born is remarkably robust thanks to the U.S. military.
But I still think G0d is messing with us, whether out of mild pique or maybe just a sense of humor that passeth human understanding. We, and 36 other states, have been visited by a plague of stinkbugs.
When they are crushed they emit an odor described by one observer as "cilantro mixed with burned rubber and dirty socks." (Actually, that kind of resembles a wine writer's description of a particularly exceptional vintage, although with strong tannins thrown in.)
They are real pests, accounting for $37 million in damage to the 2010 apple crop, according to one trade group. They are also a real nuisance, especially if they migrate into your house by the thousands to spend the winter.
Like so many unpleasant additions to our wildlife and plant life -- snakeheads, zebra mussels, kudzu, Asian carp, Burmese pythons -- they arrived here from the Far East and found the New World very much to their liking.
In my own neighborhood, we have Asian tiger mosquitoes, small, fast and very light on their little legs, not at all like the old-fashioned slow and heavy American mosquitoes that were so satisfying to smash on your forearm or leg.
The stinkbug is believed to have arrived by freighter about 15 years ago, and only lately really started to proliferate.
Stinkbugs are described as speckled brown and 1/2 to 1 inch long with no natural predators. Ours don't seem quite that big and are more of a mottled battleship gray and they have one implacable enemy in Mrs. McFeatters, who is relentless in tracking them down and crushing them with a paper towel. Perhaps because of that or perhaps because of the cold weather, they seem to have become infrequent visitors.
The USDA is said to be spending $5.7 million to find a natural predator for the stinkbug and is re-creating its mating scent to lure the amorous bugs to their death.
One hopeful predator is described as a tiny parasitic wasp from Asia that eats stinkbug eggs. But you have to ask where, after eating all the stinkbugs, the parasitic wasps will turn next?
Maybe the little wasps will become a plague of their own and we'll have to import an equally nasty predator to control them. If we listen carefully, we may hear somewhere deep in the heavens someone trying to stifle a divine laugh.
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Previously:
• 01/12/12 Fewer young Americans interested in driving
• 01/05/12 Majoring in unemployment
• 01/04/12 Cutting the military by blunt force
• 01/02/12 Pragmatic look at top words
• 12/22/11 Basketball the way to Kim's heart and nuclear weapons
• 12/21/12 Speculation and wishful thinking can get scary
• 12/20/11 A third Kim has North Korea by the throat
• 12/19/11 Congress pats itself on back for budget bill
• 12/15/11 The U.S. government is cashing in its chips, literally
• 12/14/11 TSA might try trusting its own people
• 12/12/11 That $1.2 billion? It's around here some place
• 12/09/11 State Department Creates Virtual Embassy For Iran
• 12/08/11 If you've ever tweeted, you're in the Library of Congress
• 12/07/11 Discoveries go to the core of what makes us humans
• 12/06/11 Stealing elections badly in Russia
• 12/05/11 Sometimes paranoia is common sense by another name
• 12/02/11 When the U.S. truly became one nation
• 12/01/11 Last chance to snap up a Maybach
• 11/30/11 Iran wants respect without earning it
• 11/29/11 Surprise! Spider-Man may weave a profitable web
• 11/28/11 Italians entertain novel proposition: Paying their taxes
• 11/25/11 No time to let up on al-Qaida
• 11/24/11 Congress Quietly Abolishing Friday
• 11/23/11 Cleaning up after supercommittee implosion
• 11/22/11 Jailing minors with adults adds to problems
• 11/21/11 Brilliant strategy? Action by inaction
• 11/18/11They're going to eat horses, aren't they?
• 11/17/11 A pretend stick shift for pretend drivers
• 11/16/11 Clinton's vast experiences: Did NBC pick the wrong Chelsea?
• 11/15/11 Occupy protesters, you've made your point. Now, scat
• 11/10/11 Our vets are a national problem?
• 11/09/11 Requiem for a once-great sport
• 11/08/11 A toilet as smart as its occupant
• 11/07/11 Prerevolutionary gems in need of TLC
• 11/04/11 Feds must stop scam of stealing from dead children
• 11/03/11 Bank listens very closely to customer lynch mob
• 11/01/11 TV that's leading the people away from core socialist values
• 10/31/11 NATO should not be a victim of its success
• 10/28/11 Iran mulls getting rid of president and presidency
• 10/27/11 Bienvenidos a Dayton and bring your businesses with you
• 10/26/11 Archivists long for Obama's teleprompter
• 10/25/11 United Nations to run the Internet?
• 10/24/11 Attention, world: You've got the cash. We've got the houses
• 10/19/11 Oil pipeline must be in America's future
• 10/18/11 U.S. plans limited mission in an Africa with no limits
• 10/17/11 Social Security's grave mistakes
• 10/12/11 NASA's help-wanted sign for astronauts
• 10/10/11 Saving Thomas Jefferson''s chimneys
• 10/06/11 Uncle Sam's answer to deadbeats --- robo-calls
• 10/04/11 Christie should ignore jibes on his weight
• 10/03/11 Iran says its warships will head for Jersey shore
• 09/29/11 Europeans bristle at Obama's lectures
• 09/28/11 Jessica Rabbit for the defense
• 09/27/11 Russia learns outcome of next March's presidential election
• 09/26/11 Another try at leaving no child behind
• 09/23/11 This generation needs a job more than a name
• 09/22/11 In the lane next to you: A driverless car
• 09/20/11 Cloudy, cool, chance of falling satellite
• 09/14/11 Humanitarian extortion
• 09/13/11 Paging Dr. Watson; he's there in 3 seconds
• 09/09/11 Forecasting 100 percent chance of heavy metal
• 09/08/11 A jobs program at Obama's doorstep
• 09/07/11 Iran's government afraid of the water
• 09/06/11 Congress returns, tanned, rested and testy
• 09/05/11 Space nations must clean up after themselves
• 09/02/11 Osama bin Laden died a failure and he knew it
• 09/01/11 Time to retire political pie in the face
• 08/31/11 Labor Day celebrates what, exactly?
• 08/30/11 These arrestees really are framed
• 08/25/11 When in an earthquake, block traffic
• 08/23/11 A case for discretion in deportation arrests
• 08/22/11 Tough times or not, parents shell out for school
• 08/18/11 Being unpleasant for fun, profit, promotion
• 08/17/11 Time to prepare for the end game in Libya
• 08/16/11: Super Committee starts facing reality
• 08/15/11: World's fastest plane disappears even faster
• 08/12/11: British cops track rioters through security cameras
• 08/11/11: Relax. There is no Death Star
• 08/10/11: House pages run final errands
• 08/09/11: U.S. treading water on job creation
• 08/08/11: Uncle Sam, the world's permanent guest
• 08/05/11: Most 9/11 victims not on federal death records
• 08/04/11: Russian PM calls U.S. a parasite. He should be so lucky
• 08/03/11: Congress goes from one bind to another
• 08/02/11: D.B. Cooper may no longer be a mystery
• 08/01/11: Libya's latest weapon against NATO --- lawsuits
• 07/29/11: He'll always be known as Hot Wheels Handler
• 07/25/11: Recruiting children to save a dying town
• 07/22/11: Bachmann's admirable medical candor
• 07/12/11: Social Security's grave mistakes
• 07/08/11: Debt crisis need not be constitutional crisis
• 07/07/11: Startups entice new talent with kickball, treehouses
• 07/05/11: Stranded tourists get rare treat
• 06/30/11: The dollar Americans refuse to spend
• 06/27/11: The hangman doesn't cometh
© 2011, SCRIPPS HOWARD NEWS SERVICE
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