Jewish World Review January 29, 2008 / 22 Shevat 5768
And now for the important news ....
By Argus Hamilton
Egypt protested Tuesday when Palestinians dynamited holes in their border wall in Gaza. Tens of thousands of Palestinians flooded through the openings to go shopping in Egypt for needed goods. Mexico aired it live on the Fine Living channel.
Saddam Hussein's FBI interrogator, George Piro, was interviewed Sunday on CBS' 60 Minutes. He said the jailed dictator was charming and funny and was always trying to flirt with his nurses. Bill Clinton didn't overthrow him out of professional courtesy.
Pulitzer Prize winner Steve Coll has a new book coming out this week about Osama bin Laden's family. It reveals that his dad died in a plane crash and his sister survived crashing a Cessna in Florida on her first solo flight. The World Trade Center might still be standing if Osama bin Laden had alcoholism run in his family like everybody else.
Congressman Steve Wexler collected two hundred thousand signatures Friday calling for impeachment hearings. It's too late. We engaged in pre-emptive war, torture, kidnapping and illegal wiretapping, and history will show the only one who went to jail was Kiefer Sutherland.
Tiger Woods won Sunday at the Torrey Pines Golf Club in La Jolla, where Wall Street brokerage firms had corporate tents on the course. It was the wrong weekend to have stockbrokers standing on a steep cliff above the ocean. The golf announcers could only pretend they were hang gliders until they were out of camera view.
Mitt Romney's poll numbers went up in Florida polls last week when he adopted Barack Obama's call for change. Now everyone's doing it. Even stockbrokers are asking for change, usually while sitting on the sidewalk in front of the 7-Eleven.
Bill Clinton's critics said Sunday if Hillary's elected president, he would hog the media spotlight. It's a selling point. Elect the Clintons and the next time the tabloids have space for Britney Spears or Paris Hilton, they'll be forty-five years old.
Southern California was lashed by driving rain and snowstorms in the mountains Friday as high winds and flooding hit the valleys. Mudslides and avalanches followed the next day. Living in California is like being married to a beautiful woman who's always sick.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
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© 2007, Argus Hamilton