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April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review Jan. 17, 2007 / 27 Teves, 5767

Sick of the waiting room

By Celia Rivenbark

Celia Rivenbark
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http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | If you planned to leave town with kids over the holidays, there's about a 1 zillion percent chance that you've spent the hap-hap-happiest time of the year in the urgent-care outpost of a town you've never heard of.


I'd hoped to avoid this feverish truth, but using hand sanitizer on every surface along with random spritzing of total strangers in stores with Lysol hadn't helped. As we sat at the Doctor's Immediately Urgent Prime and Emergent Medicinal Care complex, I pondered the meaning of those hollow words, "urgent" and "immediate." I also comforted myself with the image of the "Silkwood"-style shower I would take the moment we got out of there.


After two and a half hours, most of us were still there. A few had announced that they'd had time to write their wills during the wait and had even asked the receptionist to be a witness.


I'd worked so hard not to be here with my daughter, who sat silent and beet-red, occasionally rousing long enough to mutter the word "brandy" over and over. In fact, she had awakened me the night before to simply say "Brandy" and I just thought she was having some weird dream about that skinny singer with the so-so pipes and snotty attitude. It's not like we have a house full of snifters and ascots for heaven's sake.


The germ-phobic in me briefly considered sending her in alone but I realized she'd never be able to fill out the forms in her fevered state, including the one that wanted to know if she, a FOURTH GRADER, was married.


"Should I fill this out?" I asked the receptionist from behind the turtleneck I had neurotically pulled up over my nose.


"Oh, no. You're special," she said. "The forms are for all the other people to fill out."


Oh, snap!


"Brandy" came a small voice from across the room.


I returned to the plastic seat that had been factory-molded to fit the arse of an anorexic chipmunk and dutifully filled out forms detailing my daughter's imaginary marriage and work history.


An hour later, the doctor was ready for us. I could've sworn he'd trick-or-treated at my door in a Power Rangers costume just a couple of months earlier. He stuck two cotton swabs into my daughter's precious nostrils for a flu test.


"Why'd he do that?" she asked groggily.


"I dunno, but in some countries, I think it means you're engaged."


The tiny doctor returned to say it wasn't flu but, "just, uh, some kind of, like, virus or somethin'."


"Righteous," I said. We left with a prescription for something that tasted exactly like - you guessed it brandy!


Out of the mouths of babes.

Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.

Celia Rivenbark is an award-winning news reporter and freelance columnist for The Sun News in Myrtle Beach, S.C. Comment by clicking here.


Road signs
Halt your motion toward the lotion
Sudoku's got my husband's number
One short stack of smarts, please
Spa me the kids
IRS wants us to like it so much that it smacks of desperation
Uniforms: Soul-sucking sameness
Girls' pajama parties a little different now
Welcome back for guilt-free manly man
A big boo-hoo for disgraced celebs
Girls' pajama parties a little different now
When Bubbas and hoes are extra welcome
Ageless icons can't escape their ages
Gifts to kids' teachers make competitive moms antsy

Kid bumper stickers sure not ‘terrific’

© 2007, The Sun News Distributed by Knight Ridder/Tribune Information Services

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